Teen treated like dirt should dust her­self off and move on

Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK -

DEAR ABBY >> It has been two years, and I haven’t been able to get over my first love. I just grad­u­ated from high school and I’ll soon be 18, but I still can’t get used to the idea that he’s gone. When we broke up, he made me feel like dirt.

We had been a cou­ple since my fresh­man year, and he dumped me at the be­gin­ning of my ju­nior year be­cause I didn’t want to give him my vir­gin­ity. Later I dis­cov­ered he had been cheat­ing on me with my best friend. Please help. — Can’t move on

DEAR CAN’T MOVE ON >> Why did you al­low him to make you feel like “dirt”? Be GLAD you didn’t have sex with him. If you HAD, he would prob­a­bly have cheated on you any­way.

You have your whole life ahead of you. Please don’t waste one more sec­ond of it look­ing over your shoul­der and pin­ing for some­one who would pun­ish you for hang­ing onto your val­ues. You did the right thing, and you should have no re­grets.

DEAR ABBY >> I have a 7-yearold son who seems to be grow­ing up faster than I would like at times. With to­day’s mu­sic, video games, TV and movies, there are some things re­gard­ing sex I can’t pre­vent him from see­ing or learn­ing if I haven’t screened the con­tents.

I re­al­ize my son knows more than I would like for a child his age to know. Be­cause of this, my hus­band thinks it’s time to have the “birds and the bees” talk. I’m not ready to have that talk, and I don’t be­lieve my son is at an age to have this talk, ei­ther.

My hus­band is a psych ma­jor who never fails to re­mind me how knowl­edge­able he thinks he is as he tries to con­vince me that our son is ready. I know that one day my son will be cu­ri­ous about his body, but is now that time? Am I wrong in think­ing he’s too young?

— Not ready in Ok­la­homa

DEAR NOT READY >> I don’t know your son, how much adult ma­te­rial he has been ex­posed to or how ma­ture he is for his age. But I be­lieve the “birds and bees” talk should be an on­go­ing di­a­logue rather than one speech.

Chil­dren should know the cor­rect terms for their body parts, and what “pri­vate” means so they can com­mu­ni­cate ef­fec­tively. I don’t think it’s harm­ful for chil­dren to know where pup­pies, kit­tens and baby birds come from. In an­other con­ver­sa­tion, they should know what “preg­nant” means.

Your son should also know that if he has ANY ques­tions, he can come to you and his fa­ther and get straight an­swers. The ques­tion, “How does the baby get there?” will prob­a­bly come in an­other year or two. And when it is asked, he should be an­swered in a straight­for­ward man­ner.

Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www. DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069.

To re­ceive a col­lec­tion of Abby’s most mem­o­rable — and most fre­quently re­quested — po­ems and es­says, send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $7 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby — Keep­ers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 610540447. Ship­ping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.

Dear Abby

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