Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK - Dear Abby

Aries (March 21-April 19): The work will be hard, but it’s the kind of hard you choose for your­self. Be­cause this chal­lenge was one of your own de­cid­ing, you’ll ap­proach it with a glad heart and a will­ing hand. Tau­rus (April 20-May 20): Peo­ple will tell you that the past doesn’t mat­ter any­more. In­cor­rect. The past mat­ters a great deal. It’s the foun­da­tion for what you’re build­ing now. Sift, sort and re­frame it if you have to, in the name of self-em­pow­er­ment. Gem­ini (May 21-June 21): You’re will­ing to ac­cept that you have to take on some of the dull or dif­fi­cult work to bet­ter your­self. But does it have to be dull or dif­fi­cult? Of course not. Get your fair share of fun in there. Can­cer (June 22-July 22): Time to drop that per­son who makes you feel un­de­serv­ing. You’re not do­ing any­one fa­vors by feel­ing guilty for want­ing to be your own per­son, live your own life and claim the free­dom that is your birthright. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): You’re in a mood to com­part­men­tal­ize, to de­vote your­self en­tirely to what you’re in­volved with, no look­ing back (or side­ways, or for­ward for that mat­ter). With this at­ti­tude, you’ll be might­ily pro­duc­tive. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): If you have the priv­i­lege of spend­ing time with one who has not yet been molded by so­ci­ety in the sense of right and wrong and its prej­u­dices and man­ners, you will learn quite a lot. The un­der-8 set can be won­der­ful teach­ers. Li­bra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): The most fun you’ll have to­day will be in do­ing some­thing you’re more or less aw­ful at. There’s some­thing about know­ing it’s not go­ing to be good that will set free the laugh­ter of your soul. Scor­pio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): Peo­ple can be very un­fair, self-serv­ing and just plain strange in what they choose to ac­knowl­edge or ig­nore. If you’re not get­ting the val­i­da­tion you crave it may be be­cause some­one is threat­ened by your fab­u­lous­ness. Sagit­tar­ius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If your re­la­tion­ship is a mus­cle group, em­pa­thy is the dumb­bell you need to lift again and again in or­der to strengthen it. Tired of be­ing em­pa­thetic? Set it down. Shake it off. Take a break be­fore you go an­other round. Capri­corn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Hard work doesn’t al­ways pay off in the re­sult it was aimed to­ward, but it al­ways pays off in some way. Char­ac­ter, self-es­teem, the at­tain­ment of skills and re­la­tion­ships — it will come back to you in some way, be­lieve it.

Spend as much time as you can with peo­ple who live the way you want to live, who achieve the re­sults you value and who make you feel good about what you have to of­fer. It’s a no-brainer, but it bears re­peat­ing. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Seren­ity and at­tach­ment won’t go to­gether to­day. The ac­tion of bond­ing will in­volve fric­tion. You can still find hap­pi­ness, though. Ei­ther ac­cept that re­la­tion­ships are go­ing to be emo­tion­ally tax­ing or opt for soli­tude.

To write to Hol­i­day Mathis, visit www.cre­ators.com/au­thor/ hol­i­day-mathis and click “Con­tact.” DEAR ABBY >> Is it wrong to drop off a 1- and a 5-yearold at a se­nior as­sisted-liv­ing cen­ter for their great­grand­mother to baby-sit in her room? My niece does this weekly, claim­ing she’s giv­ing my mother “qual­ity time” with her great­grand­chil­dren.

My mother is in the as­sist­edliv­ing cen­ter due to is­sues my dad is en­coun­ter­ing. She’s very in­de­pen­dent and, of course, wants to help any of her fam­ily when­ever she can. But Mom has an au­toim­mune dis­ease that flares up with stress or when she gets tired. I’m con­cerned about her health and feel my niece is tak­ing ad­van­tage of her. Of course, my sis­ter sides with her daugh­ter. They have told me to butt out.

I don’t want to con­front the man­age­ment of the fa­cil­ity be­cause I want Mom to feel as in­de­pen­dent as pos­si­ble there. I don’t want them to not al­low her to do some­thing she re­ally wants to do. I have safety con­cerns, though, and feel this is not right. What do you think?

— Torn in Texas

DEAR TORN >> I’m not sure what your safety con­cerns are, but if you think the as­sisted-liv­ing cen­ter could be legally li­able, you should ad­dress them to the man­ager.

As to the baby-sit­ting be­ing too stress­ful or tir­ing for your mother, leave it up to her to de­cide if it’s too much. Some se­niors find that feel­ing needed keeps them young. The way to gauge any neg­a­tive im­pact on your mother’s health would be if it causes a flare-up of her con­di­tion — at which point her doc­tor should be no­ti­fied so he/she can put a stop to it.

DEAR ABBY >> Are par­ents of the bride re­quired to foot the cost of the wed­ding (av­er­ag­ing over $25,000 in the U.S. nowa­days) any­more? I un­der­stand they were years ago, when it was a part of her dowry, but in mod­ern times I have heard of such a thing only in your col­umn — un­less the fam­ily is rich and Daddy pays for ev­ery­thing.

I can’t imag­ine ask­ing my par­ents to pay for my wed­ding. My fi­ance and I are aim­ing for — dress in­cluded — $1,000 or less. Are par­ents ac­tu­ally ex­pected to spend thou­sands on their daugh­ter’s wed­ding? It’s their daugh­ter and son-in-law who want it. — Just ask­ing in Bri­tish


DEAR JUST ASK­ING >> No. A wed­ding is a GIFT, and while it would be gen­er­ous for the par­ents to pitch in, there is no re­quire­ment that they do so. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: The ques­tion now that re­ally vexes

Is where we’re gonna place our “X”es.

Vot­ing, folks, should not up­set ya —

Be glad we’re livin’ where they let ya.


Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www. DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069.

Abby shares more than 100 of her fa­vorite recipes in two book­lets: “Abby’s Fa­vorite Recipes” and “More Fa­vorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $14 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Cook­book­let Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 61054-0447. (Ship­ping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.)

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