We weren’t ready for it

GA Voice - - Outspoken -

“We weren’t ready for it.” Those were the words of­fered to me by a close friend af­ter the elec­tion. Her point was that since 53 per­cent of white women, 6 per­cent of black women, and 32 per­cent of Lati­nas voted for Trump, we weren’t ready for a fe­male pres­i­dent. She said we as women had to learn to work to­gether to get a woman in the White House that a vast ma­jor­ity of us could get be­hind.

I have heard much pub­lic de­bate on whether or not women thrive in a pack and are quick to sup­port one an­other, or if we are more soli­tary crea­tures and will eas­ily throw each other to the wolves for sur­vival. So­ci­ol­o­gists have likely spent mil­lions of dol­lars and hours in the lab at­tempt­ing to study this ques­tion, but they need look no fur­ther than this one place to find the an­swers they are look­ing for - the women’s re­stroom.

Ladies, how we treat each other in there is a great in­di­ca­tor of how we would take care of each other on the out­side.

For in­stance, I re­cently at­tended a semi­for­mal lun­cheon at the Ge­or­gia World Congress Cen­ter, the ma­jor­ity of at­ten­dees be­ing women. I headed to the re­stroom be­fore go­ing to my ta­ble and got in line. The first thing I no­ticed is the clean­ing lady sweep­ing with her equip­ment and no one say­ing a word to her. I talked to her when she passed me by, and she seemed gen­uinely ap­pre­cia­tive. We also stood in line for awhile be­fore the stall doors be­gan to open. Know­ing there was a line, do you think the women in­side were mak­ing sure to ef­fi­ciently go to the bath­room and get but­toned back up so oth­ers could get in there quickly? I as­sume they were tak­ing their time to check an email or see how well their Face­book post was per­form­ing.

That is if they were sit­ting down. Mak­ing my way into a stall, I saw the rem­nants of the last woman’s trip on the toi­let seat and had to make sure to clean her mess be­fore I could be­gin. If you can’t strad­dle and aim, why leave it for the next woman to take care of it? Not quite an ar­gu­ment for the pack men­tal­ity some hope we have.

Once I was done and ready to wash my hands, ev­ery sin­gle sink was oc­cu­pied yet no one was wash­ing their hands. Ev­ery lady was in the mir­ror primp­ing at the sink, un­able to miss the im­age of my re­flec­tion in their mir­ror star­ing at them to move so I could have my turn. I lit­er­ally stood there for at least a minute be­fore any­one budged. Frus­trated, I made my way out of there, mak­ing sure to once again thank the clean­ing lady as I tossed my pa­per towel in her trash­can.

Women are usu­ally deemed the so­cial ones in our so­ci­ety. We gag­gle to­gether at gath­er­ings talk­ing over one an­other to catch up on the lat­est news or gos­sip, and are ex­pected to eas­ily break down bar­ri­ers with one an­other over a glass of wine. But be­hind closed doors, when no one is watch­ing, we aren’t as com­fort­able with each other as we would like to think we are. It’s ev­ery girl for her­self.

Maybe my friend was right, maybe we weren’t ready. I just hope we fig­ure it out so I can have a Madam Pres­i­dent in my life­time.

“Be­hind closed doors, when no one is watch­ing, we aren’t as com­fort­able with each other as we would like to think we are. It’s ev­ery girl for her­self.”

Melissa Carter is one of the Morn­ing Show hosts on B98.5. In ad­di­tion, she is a writer for the Huff­in­g­ton Post. She is rec­og­nized as one of the first out ra­dio per­son­al­i­ties in At­lanta and one of the few in the coun­try. Fol­low her on Twit­ter@Melis­saCarter

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