Owl

Hello Mr. Magazine - - CHALLENGE TRADITION -

Ner­dus pen­na­tus noc­tua Rarely seen in pub­lic much less the “scene,” Owls are the elu­sive, in­tro­verted, and of­ten ex­clu­sively noc­tur­nal sub-species of gay man, de­riv­ing most of their Vi­ta­min D from ra­di­a­tion em­a­nat­ing out their com­puter mon­i­tors. While some Owls spend their evenings hook­ing up on Grindr, many oth­ers are busy cod­ing an en­tirely new and su­pe­rior hook-up app that will soon be avail­able across all mo­bile OS plat­forms. To win an Owl’s heart, know all your X-Men gay sto­ry­lines (ex­plicit, im­plied, and meta-), com­ment on their gay Harry Pot­ter slash-fic­tion, or or­der a print of their ex­plicit, com­puter-gen­er­ated art­work in which iconic male comic book char­ac­ters are de­picted hav­ing anal sex.

Nat­u­ral habi­tats:

On­line: Red­dit, Twit­ter, Buz­zfeed. IRL: Comic-Con, cos-play events, Neil Gaiman book sign­ings, Joss Whe­don con­ven­tions. Cod­ing, Dr. Who trivia.

Pale to the point

Spe­cial skills: Dis­tin­guish­ing fea­tures:

of trans­parency.

Se­cretly has enor­mous pe­nis.

Trivia:

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