PUBLIC SAFETY AND LAWS
ZERO: Every part of town has a highly dedicated and effective neighborhood watch. This patrol consists primarily of fourteenyear-old boys who habitually call things like Lana Del Rey and movies that aren’t The Fast And The Furious 6 “like totally gay”.
FIVE: Sodomy was decriminalized at least ten years ago, and the cops rarely even ticket public offenders.
TEN: Self-proclaimed “straight-acting masc 4 masc ONLY” men live in their own walled neighborhood, consisting primarily of weightlifting gyms and protein smoothie stores. Everyone – club masc included – is happier this way.
Tim Forster is a Montreal-based “writer.” Okay, fine: he makes coffee in a nice brunch joint, but he gets paid to write sometimes, honestly. Follow him @timothyjforster.