How to turn a mis­sion state­ment into sales. Plus: The Jarg­ona­tor

Swat­ting the buzz­words of busi­ness

Inc. (USA) - - CONTENTS - By BEN SCHOTT

AIR­LINED / • verb.

The anti-con­sumer prac­tices of 19th-cen­tury train op­er­a­tors gave us “rail­roaded.” To­day, fliers get air­lined by ris­ing prices, tiny seats, and poor ser­vice. It’s nice to know some things never change. Source: Avi­a­tionPros/ PR Newswire

KAIGO-JIGOKU

/ • noun. “Care­giv­ing hell”—a ne­ol­o­gism used by young folk in Ja­pan to de­scribe hav­ing to look af­ter aged rel­a­tives. Are the Ja­panese tak­ing on the Ger­mans in the “there should be a word for it” stakes?

Source: The Guardian

PANK / • noun. “Pro­fes­sional aunt, no kids.” PANKs “play a fi­nan­cially mean­ing­ful role in the lives of other peo­ple’s kids, are ac­tive on so­cial me­dia, and in­flu­ence the pur­chas­ing de­ci­sions of those around them.” We as­sume the male ver­sion is PUNK. Source: Forbes SWIPERS / • noun.

The rise of self-scan­ning su­per­mar­ket check­outs has in­creased the in­ci­dence of swipers (“seem­ingly well-in­ten­tioned pa­trons en­gag­ing in rou­tine shoplift­ing”). Is there some hi-tech rea­son why we don’t just call these peo­ple thieves? Source: BBC CRAP / • noun.

The lat­est acronymic in­vest­ment strat­egy, CRAP fo­cuses on com­put­ers, re­sources, Amer­i­can banks, and phone car­ri­ers. It’s as if this col­umn were be­ing writ­ten for me. Source: Seek­ing Al­pha

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