Dream trip not yours to keep, so wake up!
Dear Amy: I have a moral dilemma and am requesting your impartial advice.
My longtime friend got tickets to a major event. Her husband declined to attend with her, she asked me to go in his place and I did.
At the event, we won a dream trip to a foreign country as part of a raffle giveaway.
I know she would prefer to go on the trip with her husband, so I am truly conflicted and need to make a decision very soon.
There is no option to buy tickets for our husbands, and only “the guest” — me — and not the primary ticketholder can transfer the spot on the trip.
Should I give up my spot and give it to her husband, or should I go on the trip myself? I feel that if I go, she will resent me, and her friendship is dear to me. I also feel that if I give up this chance of a lifetime I will forever kick myself.
Thank you for any guidance you can offer.
Betwixt and Between
Dear Betwixt: You have already benefited from these tickets by attending this “major event” as “the guest” (in your words) of the ticketholder.
The person who purchased these tickets and who invited you as a guest has the right to retain the prize.
You would have had more standing to claim half of the winnings if you had purchased your ticket from your friend. The tickets she purchased won the prize, and so you should let her invite whomever she chooses to go on this dream trip.
If you offer to give up the spot she may insist that you come with her, but it’s hard to imagine you would enjoy this trip when you know the price you pay may be your friendship.
Dear Amy: Years ago, my boss and I were having lunch together.
Our private, business-related conversation was being interrupted by his brand-new status symbol — a cellphone.
One table away, a young woman and her boyfriend were seated. They were trying to make plans for their wedding but they kept getting interrupted because he was repeatedly answering his cellphone.
After the fourth or fifth call, she — in a dignified manner — dumped her full water glass into his lap, got up and left the restaurant.
My boss quietly moved my water glass to his side of the table and took no more calls.
Dear Cell: Gives new meaning to, “The drink’s on me.” Send questions to Amy Dickinson by e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org or by mail to Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.