No, no DiCaprio

Metro USA (Boston) - - WKND -

Bar­ring an as­ter­oid mak­ing a bee­line for our planet, it’s the safest bet in the world: Next Sun­day, Leonardo DiCaprio is go­ing to win an Os­car. And it will take an even greater freak oc­cur­rence to change our minds about this: He shouldn’t.

That’s no diss on DiCaprio him­self. He’s a very fine ac­tor. He should have even won the tro­phy two years ago, af­ter he bull­dozed his way through “The Wolf of Wall Street,” a turn that re­quired co­pi­ous en­ergy and movie star charisma.

Mean­while, in “The Revenant,” which will likely nab him his first Goldie, he crawled across snow, swam through cold wa­ter and growled like the Mup­pets’ An­i­mal. He suf­fered for his art, but only phys­i­cally.

He’ll be re­warded for his trou­bles, be­cause the Academy, like count­less award bod­ies al­ready, have bought into his rhap­sodies about how su­per­hard “The Revenant” was to make. Still, peo­ple may one day no­tice he doesn’t get the chance to do any­thing but hurt. His film is es­sen­tially a doc­u­men­tary about an ac­tor who re­ally, re­ally wants his Os­car. Re­ward “The Mar­tian’s” Matt Da­mon in­stead!

Will this be Leo’s year? We’ll find out on Sun­day Feb. 28, but we wish DiCaprio would win for some­thing other than “The Revenant.” TWEN­TI­ETH CEN­TURY FOX

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