Metro USA (Boston) - - NEWS - TOM FORE­MAN

Amid two ex­haust­ing weeks in the rat­tle and hum of the po­lit­i­cal con­ven­tions, I have es­caped to a Denny’s for break­fast. No bull­horns or rag­ing bit­ter­ness. Just eggs, pan­cakes and a hi­lar­i­ous kid at the next ta­ble.

“I’d like to have a T-Rex,” he says as his younger brother grins and his par­ents stare blank-faced. They’re prob­a­bly re­call­ing some ill-con­sid­ered pre­vi­ous pet now known sim­ply as “the cat episode.”

The kid then de­scribes all the great things he’d do with his dino friend. It would wake him in the morn­ing. Go to school with him. Birth­day par­ties. Base­ball prac­tice.

I’m crouch­ing over my hash browns think­ing how it re­ally would not work that way. Sure, it sounds like fun owning a fierce crea­ture ca­pa­ble of shak­ing the earth, de­vour­ing all it sees and scar­ing the bul­lies away.

But then one day it growls at you. It snaps a treat from your hand a lit­tle too ag­gres­sively. Next thing you know it is in­sult­ing for­eign­ers and its wife is pla­gia­riz­ing speeches. Or it’s in­stalling a se­cret server in the base­ment, send­ing clas­si­fied emails and deny­ing it to your face.

Analo­gies aside, I’m not say­ing Trump and Clin­ton are di­nosaurs (although cer­tainly plenty of crit­ics would) I’m just point­ing out these big­ger-than-life fig­ures have a way of tak­ing over every­thing in their reach. Ded­i­cated vot­ers — left, right and cen­ter — grab onto these po­lit­i­cal be­he­moths only to re­al­ize they don’t have the T-Rex. The T-Rex has them.

And soon enough those same vot­ers are busier than they ever imag­ined try­ing to ar­gue away the can­di­date’s flaws, ex­cuse their lies and jus­tify the yard sign out front. Like kids in a break­fast joint, we dis­miss many think­ing, rea­son­able, sober and sane lead­ers as bor­ing — and we pine for a thun­der lizard who will an­swer only to our side, not re­al­iz­ing it will take all of us to make ei­ther one of these be­he­moths do what we want — not what he or she wants.

The kid’s break­fast ar­rives and he changes sub­jects.

“Who doesn’t like ba­con? Ex­cept for maybe pigs.”

Good. Now he’s mak­ing sense.


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