Northwest Arkansas Democrat-Gazette - - STYLE - bil­ly­gra­ham.org BILLY GRA­HAM Write to Billy Gra­ham in care of Billy Gra­ham Evan­ge­lis­tic As­so­ci­a­tion, 1 Billy Gra­ham Park­way, Char­lotte, N.C. 28201 or visit the web­site at

DEAR REV. GRA­HAM : I think the idea that you should stay mar­ried to the same per­son all your life is out of date. I can’t imag­ine be­ing mar­ried to some­one that long. I’d get bored and de­cide to find some­one else. You prob­a­bly won’t agree, but it makes sense to me.

— L.G. DEAR L.G: I’m very sorry you feel this way — be­cause there is no greater joy than shar­ing your whole life with the spouse God has given you. But if we en­ter mar­riage think­ing that we’ll prob­a­bly move on af­ter a few years, we’ll never ex­pe­ri­ence this joy.

Af­ter all, God gave mar­riage to us, and He meant for it to be a re­la­tion­ship that would last as long as both spouses are alive. The rea­son is be­cause God knows we need each other, and only when we love each other and are com­mit­ted to each other will we be truly happy. Other­wise our re­la­tion­ship will al­ways be in­se­cure and un­sta­ble, and we’ll never ex­pe­ri­ence the joy God in­tends us to have. I of­ten think of Je­sus’ words con­cern­ing mar­riage: “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. There­fore what God has joined to­gether, let no one sep­a­rate” (Matthew 19:6).

The great­est en­emy of true love in a mar­riage is self­ish­ness — liv­ing for our­selves in­stead of each other. If your only con­cern is what your spouse can give you, your re­la­tion­ship will al­ways be shaky. But when you’re truly com­mit­ted to each other, you’ll want to serve each other and help each other. This is true love.

How do we get this love? It is God’s gift to us, as we open our hearts and lives to His love. Turn to Je­sus Christ and ask Him to come into your life to­day. The Bi­ble says, “We love be­cause he first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

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