PARAPHERNAUTICA

Passage Maker - - @ Rest -

Edi­tor-in-Chief Jonathan Cooper loves/hates this al­l­elec­tric scooter from Ger­many.

The Scrooser Elec­tric Scooter is made in Ger­many, has a bizarre name (which makes for an even more bizarre verb), costs a king’s ran­som, and hon­estly isn’t all that fast or pow­er­ful. So why am I writ­ing about it? Be­cause, sim­ply put, it is breath­tak­ing. Mod­ern art at its finest, the steel-frame scooter is the very def­i­ni­tion of sim­plic­ity, from its sweep­ing tubu­lar frame that looks like it was sculpted into form by min­i­mal­ist artist, Josef Al­bers, then painted and wheeled by a name­less ro­bot at Tesla. The Scrooser is form and func­tion in one bright and shiny and beau­ti­ful pack­age.

As for its specs—min­i­mal­ist ones at that—the stan­dard scooter can hit flat-ground speeds up to 12.5 mph; for an ad­di­tional 3 mph, se­cure the “su­per­charged” ver­sion. At 125 lbs (laden by its quite nec­es­sary lithium-ion bat­tery pack), it’s not nec­es­sar­ily a light­weight, either. If you grab one, plan to rig a hoist from your davit to shore. Once on­shore and fully charged, the lit­tle guy will net you 34 miles on a charge (also on flat ground, I as­sume), and a 2.5 hour recharge will grant you plenty of time to check out the lo­cal din­ing scene while gapers gaze in won­der. Though nice to look at, the Scrooser web­site store is a wee bit con­fus­ing to nav­i­gate, with its wide range of colors, op­tions, and scootery ac­cou­trements. But ul­ti­mately, the point is this: If you find your­self with a thirst for a fash­ion-for­ward, ri­otously ex­pen­sive, en­vi­ron­men­tally friendly scooter to zip around ports of call, the Scrooser might just be the one for you. Scroose on!

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