Survivor Rhonda Dolberry came back stronger than ever
Rhonda Dolberry knows what it’s like to face adversity and come through it stronger.
Dolberry was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer in 2007 during the same time her late husband was in the fight of his life against non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.
“I remember that morning just like it was yesterday. I was here at the house getting ready to go back to the hospital to take things to him. I’d had a shower and I remember feeling this lump in my armpit. It was unusual. I’d never felt that before, and I thought to myself, ‘What is this?’” Dolberry said.
Things were so hectic at that point in her life, it would’ve been easy for her to ignore the lump. Yet, she couldn’t rid herself of the thought that she needed to tell her doctor about it.
“Initially, I thought it was nothing, but I know God was speaking to me and telling me I needed to get it checked out,” she said.
Within the week, she called her
doctor and went in for a checkup. Her primary care physician was concerned about what he saw and referred her to another doctor.
Recalling specific details of that time in her life is hard for Dolberry, who was splitting time between doctor’s visits and her sick husband.
“Everything seems like a blur … It was real, real fast. He did some tests. I had a biopsy. Long story short, it ended up turning out to be cancerous. I remember the doctor coming back in the room. He just had this look on his face. He said it was cancerous and we needed to move quickly. I had 27 lymph nodes removed, and all 27 were cancerous. I had my left breast removed,” she said.
Her mastectomy was in July, and on Aug. 31, Dolberry lost her husband.
Surgery, radiation, chemotherapy and the death left Dolberry reeling.
“From May to September was like a fog. All of this happened very quickly. … It was just so devastating having to deal with it. Before my husband passed, he was lucid some of the time. After my mastectomy I’d gone back to the hospital to see him and he told me everything was going to be all right. … I didn’t really get a chance to grieve or think about anything until well after I’d had surgery. It was a numbness. Numbness is how I would describe how I was feeling.”
Dolberry credits friends, family and her church family for helping her stay strong during this trial-some time.
“I know being around my family played a big part in me recovering from that journey,” she said.
Dolberry has found a way to take the darkest days of her life and shine a light on others.
“Life was good. We were rocking right along doing regular things. I was just an ordinary person, but I had some extraordinary things happen to me. I asked God, ‘Why me?’ and I heard, ‘Why not you?’ I never thought I’d be able to smile again. I thought all my joy was gone, but it hasn’t happened like that. I speak about my illness all the time,” she said.
Sharing her story with others has given her the opportunity to meet many different people and educate them about breast cancer and caring for themselves.
“I have met so many people at the grocery store, mall, different churches. I tell people I have a party inside every day because I’m so thankful to be here. … I get a lot of hugs,” Dolberry said.
Dolberry has been involved with Komen Texarkana since her diagnosis, and this year she was chosen as the Honorary Survivor to represent survivors at Race for the Cure on Oct. 21 at Four States Fairgrounds.
“It was a great honor. I was surprised. They kept it a secret. They really did. It was just a humbling experience and honor. I want to let people know I’m not ashamed of who I am. A lot of years ago, you didn’t say the ‘C’ word. You just didn’t say that. I’m proud to represent the organization that’s willing to help everybody. It’s an inclusive organization. I’m proud to be a 65-yearold African-American woman who can help people move in another direction,” Dolberry said. “I’m just proud to have a voice where I can speak out for those people that need it.”
Through Komen she’s been able to take breast cancer education to African-American women in the community.
“We’ve been trying to reach other African-American women. … Even though Caucasian women have a higher rate of breast cancer, we have a higher mortality rate. It’s usually more aggressive and more advanced. Many African-American women aren’t finding it in time. We’re not doing our breast checks. We’re not having that relationship with our doctors so we can go ahead and do what needs to be done quickly. I think it’s all about being educated and getting the word out. We need to talk about it more and more. … We need to be able to let people know what’s available,” Dolberry said. “We need more foot soldiers to spread the word.”
Dolberry, who’s at a higher risk for her cancer returning, chooses not to spend her energy worrying.
“I’m thankful. I feel great. I still have my mammograms and checkups. I go to an oncologist every six months. Due to the number of lymph nodes that had cancer, I’m at a higher risk of cancer returning. But I told the doctors they’d done what they needed to do and I prayed, so I done what I needed to do and I’m not going to worry about it returning. I can’t live my life in fear of cancer coming back. I’m having a real good time right now. Life is good. I’m enjoying myself and everybody I meet. … I think I can help. That’s my goal. If I can reach somebody and they’ll listen to me because of my experience, I think it’s wonderful,” she said.