Ev­ery­one can’t win

The Covington News - - Crime -

It's time for my an­nual ‘ev­ery child's a win­ner' rant. It's not that I don't be­lieve that ev­ery child is a win­ner. It's more that I don't be­lieve ev­ery child wins ev­ery time. I can al­most feel the dag­gers right now. Yet, se­ri­ously, are we help­ing or hurt­ing our kids when we dole out a tro­phy just be­cause they show up for prac­tice? Or, what about the stu­dent who mod­els "good be­hav­ior" and re­ceives a cer­tifi­cate? Isn't the re­ward that he didn't get sent to the prin­ci­pal's of­fice or lose his re­cess?

Per­haps it's the kind ges­ture she re­ceives in turn for the kind ges­ture she gave? Geez, peo­ple; I'm just say­ing. There has to be a com­pro­mise on all this en­ti­tle­ment swirling around. And to be fair, it's not the kids' fault.

Some­how, we adults and par­ents have gone awry. This re­minds me of one of my 6-year-old son's bas­ket­ball games from ear­lier this year. As for my son, he played the en­tire first half of the game in his sleep. One lit­tle girl, bless her heart, cried the whole time. And oth­ers, well, let's just say their skills lacked ex­e­cu­tion. Half­time fi­nally came and the minia­ture play­ers, along with their par­ents, headed for a dimly-lit ‘locker room' where the coach spoke glow­ingly about how well the boys and girls were play­ing. What!? Were we wit­ness­ing the same game? I stood to the side, quiet but shak­ing my head and think­ing...we adults are the prob­lem.

Cru­cify me or not. I'm not say­ing we should de­mean our chil­dren or squash their en­thu­si­asm. But I do think we owe them an hon­est, yet com­pas­sion­ate, as­sess­ment of how they're track­ing in sports, in the class­room, in life.

If they think ev­ery­thing they do is fan­tas­tic and done ex­ceed­ingly well - even when it's not; don't be sur­prised when they show up the first day on a job de­mand­ing the cor­ner of­fice, a com­pany car and an ex­pense ac­count.

Kysa Daniels is a jour­nal­ist, non­profit pro­fes­sional and mother of three boys. For more Ad­ven­tures in Par­ent­ing and par­ent­ing tips, email kysa@kysadaniels.com.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from USA

© PressReader. All rights reserved.