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po­lice as­sis­tance. The man con­tin­ued his bel­liger­ence to­ward of­fi­cers and re­fused to leave the fes­tiv­i­ties. Po­lice noted that the man ap­peared to be heav­ily in­tox­i­cated. He was ar­rested, hand­cuffed and es­corted out the the area. Fol­low­ing a hos­pi­tal stop for med­i­cal clear­ance, the man was taken to the county jail. He also re­ceived a tres­pass warn­ing from all city parks and re­cre­ation fa­cil­i­ties.

It could’ve been so much worse

PALM BEACH GAR­DENS Af­ter meet­ing a woman around 4 a.m. out­side a gas sta­tion, a man in­vited her to have a few cock­tails at a nearby bar. Af­ter con­sum­ing sev­eral bev­er­ages, the pair de­cided to get a room at an inn in the 4100 block of North­lake Boule­vard. The man said that af­ter hav­ing in­ter­course he fell asleep. When he woke up he was not in a tub of ice with his kid­ney miss­ing, but his phone, gold neck­lace, gold bracelet, Je­sus face charm and the woman were gone. He said the items were worth ap­prox­i­mately $2,500. He was able to give po­lice a de­scrip­tion of his one night stand and said she had scar that looked like a bul­let wound. On sur­veil­lance footage the woman could be clearly seen, but she had her hand by her face mak­ing iden­ti­fi­ca­tion im­pos­si­ble.

But she paid her money

JUPITER — “Why the (ex­ple­tive) do they want me tres­passed? I paid for my drinks here and now they want to tres­pass me?” Th­ese were the words an in­tox­i­cated woman had for po­lice who had ar­rived at an es­tab­lish­ment in the first block of East In­diantown Road. The es­tab­lish­ment felt the woman’s per­son­alit y was a bit ro­bust for their clien­tele and asked that she be tres­passed in­def­i­nitely. Af­ter be­ing in­formed that she was no longer wel­come and fol­low­ing her short rant, the woman threw her purse to a man she was with and went charg­ing across all six lanes of traf­fic on East In­diantown Road. With of­fi­cers in pur­suit and com­mand­ing her to stop, the woman kept run­ning while scream­ing “ah­h­h­hhh!” Of­fi­cers caught her on the south side of the road. There they ar­rested and hand­cuffed her. She was taken to jail.

Sign him up for danc­ing be­hind bars

BOCA RATON A 34-yearold man was ar­rested af­ter he caused a dis­tur­bance and took a swing at em­ploy­ees at an es­tab­lish­ment in the 100 block of South­east Mizner Boule­vard. The man had been danc­ing, wav­ing his mid­dle fingers and yelling out ob­scen­i­ties when he was asked to leave and re­fused.

Pur­chase gone wrong

PALM BEACH GAR­DENS — Tex­ting back and forth a plan to buy “weed,” a man ar­rived at a res­i­dence in the 10000 block of Plant Drive be­liev­ing he was meet­ing the friend he had been tex­ting to pur­chase mar­i­juana. In­stead of get­ting “weed,” the man re­ceived a beat­ing from three men in ski masks who stole his phone. The man said af­ter be­ing beaten he man­aged to get to his car and re­trieve a BB gun. He claims he chased one of the men for a mile be­fore catch­ing him. The man he caught said one of the other at­tack­ers had his phone. Later while talk­ing to po­lice, the vic­tim said he had smoked three “joints” (mar­i­juana cig­a­rettes) and taken sev­eral pre­scrip­tion med­i­ca­tions that day. A K-9 Unit lo­cated his phone in some bushes ap­prox­i­mately three houses down from where the as­sault took place. The vic­tim was treated by EMS and then trans­ported to the hos­pi­tal.

Po­lice ser­e­nade

JUPITER — A heav­ily-in­tox­i­cated man was dis­cov­ered ly­ing in the road in the 600 block of West In­diantown Road. When con­fronted by po­lice, the man got up and said he was on his way home. Rather than head home, how­ever, the man be­gan scream­ing and then broke into song. Though told mul­ti­ple times to stop singing and go home, the man was con­vinced that his one-man show must go on and con­tin­ued belt­ing out the tune. Ad­vised that he was cre­at­ing a pub­lic dis­tur­bance the man shifted gears and in­vited the of­fi­cers to “box him” as he took an ag­gres­sive stance. Told one last time to go home, the man stated “you don’t own th­ese streets, I do.” He was ar­rested and taken to jail.

Stay, go, get punched

JUPITER — Af­ter ar­riv­ing by boat to an es­tab­lish­ment in the 1100 block of Love Street, a cou­ple be­gan drink­ing. At one point the man de­cided he’d had enough and that it was time to go. The woman, how­ever, de­cided that the man had drank too much to safely op­er­ate the boat and that it was not time to go. A ‘stay or go’ ar­gu­ment en­sued and some­time be­tween yelling “Hit me (ex­ple­tive)!” and “Is that all you got?!” the man was struck in the face and chest. The pair was sep­a­rated and the woman later ad­mit­ted strik­ing the man. She was ar­rested and taken to jail.

The force is not strong with this one

BOCA RATON — A ju­ve­nile was ar­rested in the 5900 block of West Glades Road af­ter steal­ing a Yoda Star Wars fig­ure val­ued at $27.99. He was re­leased to a par­ent.

Bur­rito is weapon of choice for an­gry wife

JUPITER — A woman threw a bur­rito on her hus­band and struck him in the face while out­side their ve­hi­cle in the 1300 block of Jupiter Beach Road. The man said they had gone to a movie and that she had lost her cell­phone. He stated that the staff at the the­ater helped them find it. De­spite it be­ing her cell­phone and the fact that she had been in pos­ses­sion of it, she blamed him for los­ing it. He pleaded with her that it was her phone, that she was re­spon­si­ble for it and that it had been found so it was a moot point. Though he sug­gested they just go home, she wanted food so he took them to a drive-through and then to the beach. Af­ter ex­it­ing the ve­hi­cle, pre­par­ing her food and hand­ing it to her, the “fly­ing bur­rito slapfest” went down. The woman was ar­rested on a charge of do­mes­tic bat­tery.

The purple wig was a dead give­away

BOYNTON BEACH — A cell­phone tech­ni­cian met a man in the 1000 block of West Gate­way Boule­vard to re­pair his phone. Upon com­plet­ing the re­pair, he ad­vised his cus­tomer the cost would be $149. The cus­tomer left the area briefly, then came back and grabbed his phone. A strug­gle be­tween the two en­sued, un­til the cus­tomer sprayed a chem­i­cal at the tech­ni­cian. The cus­tomer, de­scribed as a man in a purple wig and sun­glasses, fled.

Be care­ful what you wish for

J UPI T E R — Stand­ing in con­tin­ued on 3

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