Dear Abby:

The Times-Tribune - - BUSINESS -

I got mar­ried to a won­der ful guy 14 years ago, but af­ter a year of mar­riage, our chil­dren (his 10-year-old and my 12- and 13-year-olds) couldn’t stand one an­other and caused a lot of prob­lems. I was bro­ken­hear ted when he gave me di­vorce pa­pers. I moved out but con­tin­ued to date him with­out our kids around.

Seven years ago, af­ter his son moved out, I moved back in, but he won’t ask me to re­marry him. My kids get along fine with him, but his son hates me and re­fuses to come to any hol­i­day or bir th­day cel­e­bra­tion that I host.

Should I move out and move on? — Hope­less in Ohio

Dear Hope­less: That this man has al­lowed his son to dic­tate how the two of you will spend your lives is ver y sad. Un­less you can ac­cept liv­ing with the sta­tus quo (which has to be painful), the an­swer to your ques­tion is: Move on.

Dear Abby: in 2014, I loaned a fam­ily friend $5,000. At the time, and ever since, I never asked the rea­son for the loan. Over time we lost touch. How­ever, we re­cently re­con­nected and de­cided to go on a road/ camp­ing trip through­out the West.

Three days in, we both re­al­ized it was a poor idea to travel to­gether for an ex­tended pe­riod of time. He has now be­come quite nasty and speaks ill of me. Should I write and re­quest pay­ment of the loan or let it go? — Out of Pocket in Ve­gas

Dear Out of Pocket: If you had the fore­thought to put IN WRIT­ING the fact you were lend­ing this per­son money, you have a prayer of hav­ing the loan re­paid. If you didn’t, you can tr y writ­ing to this fam­ily (former) friend, but legally it won’t be wor th the pa­per your let­ter is writ­ten on. If that’s the case, con­sider this an ex­pen­sive les­son.

Dear Abby: I have a ver y good friend I’ve known for 18 years. With­out fail, ever y time we’re on the phone and she gets an­other call, she’ll say, “Oh, let me call you right back,” but she never does.

We could be in the mid­dle of a con­ver­sa­tion but she doesn’t call back.

Is she a true friend? What should I say or do? — Not Fin­ished in the East

Dear Not Fin­ished:

Yrather than wait end­lessly, call HER back the same day. And when you do, tell her ex­actly how her lack of con­cern for your feel­ings has made you feel.

Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www.dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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