Week 904: We move on back
Ardiness: The state of being crowded into a small space. Elved: Dug a North Pole hole. After a 21/ 2-year residence in the Saturday paper, during which we could desecrate the Jewish Sabbath instead of the Christian one, the Style Invitational happily returns this week to Sundays with one more variation of our stock in trade: the neologism contest. This one, suggested by Malcolm Fleschner of Palo Alto, Calif., is pretty challenging, but the Empress trusts in the Powers of Loserdom to deliver. This week, as we move from one end of the week to the other: Move the first letter in a word or name to the end of that word and define the resulting word, as in Malcolm’s own examples above. You may use it in a sentence if the sentence is drool-generatingly hilarious.
Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place wins a set of “The Axis of Evil II” finger puppets from 2002, featuring not-bad-to-poor likenesses of John Ashcroft, George W. Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld; donated by Inge Ashley. Yes, we know, we know. And we are happy to accept the donation of the Steny Hoyer voodoo doll or whatever. Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt or yearned-for Loser Mug. Honorable mentions get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Loser magnets. First offenders get a smelly, tree-shaped air “freshener” (Fir Stink for their First Ink). One prize per entrant per week. Send your entries by email to firstname.lastname@example.org or by fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, Jan. 31. Put “Week 904” in the subject line of your e-mail, or it risks being ignored as spam. Include your name, postal address and phone number with your entry. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be edited for taste or content. Results to be published Feb. 20 (Feb. 18 online). No purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. The revised title for next week’s results is by Christopher Lamora. The honorable-mentions subhead was submitted separately by Kevin Dopart, Jeff Contompasis and Beverley Sharp.