Can sharing boss’s bed be innocent?
Dear Amy: My wife
occasionally has to travel with her boss overnight to operate technology at meetings. She makes the travel arrangements. I noticed a couple of years ago that she booked one room with two beds. When I asked her about it she said it was for the purpose of cutting costs. She says this is a way that he is able to give her a pay raise each year. She claims she would never cheat on me, nor would he cheat on his wife of 33 years.
He is a frugal man, so I accepted that explanation. However, I recently came across an email that showed a room reservation for a single kingsize bed. When I asked her about it, she said it was the only room type available, and that there is nothing going on between them. She said there is plenty of room for them to stay on their own side of the bed. Apparently it wasn’t the first time this happened. Should I accept her explanation? Your thoughts?
I hate to introduce another note of doubt into your relationship, but I cannot imagine this situation being benign.
I suggest you find out what your wife really means by “operating technology.” She should be willing to give up her raise in order to book two rooms.
Dear Amy: A few weeks ago I ran into an acquaintance who has been fighting breast cancer for the past year. We had a lovely conversation. She is very forthright about her diagnosis, and her spirit is admirable.
I mentioned I was midway through a book that I knew she’d love. I promised to share it when I finished it. As it turns out, the last quarter of the book is devoted to the protagonist’s own cancer diagnosis and his eventual death. Should I still give it to her?
The book is very good. I know she’d appreciate how this character evolves, but I don’t want to be insensitive. Then again, if you eliminate books with people dying in them, the library shelves would be bare. What do you think I should do?
You should give your friend a different book that you also love but does not stress your acquaintance with an intense dying scene.
Dear Amy: Your response to “Concerned Friends,” the couple whose once active friends have become frail and homebound, was right on the money.
My father and stepmother were increasingly homebound the last two years of their lives. They were also dreadfully bored and cruelly lonely. Visits from friends and family were like water in the desert.
I’d like to urge readers to please visit the homebound as often as you can. Also, please realize that the homebound may not have much to say. There’s not much stimulation in their lives. Their mental abilities may be compromised. This means that you, the visitor, must supply stimulation. Can you sing or play an instrument? Describe a cultural or sporting event? Tell jokes? Bring a grandchild who is learning to walk/talk/count to 10/do a magic trick?
Your friends may not respond the way they used to. But please, never doubt that your visit made their day and may have prolonged their lives.