Brand Icks: The win­ners of Style In­vi­ta­tional Week 1140

The Washington Post Sunday - - ARTS & STYLE - BY PAT MY­ERS

In Week 1140 we re­peated a 2004 con­test in which we asked you to name a real brand and pair it with a prod­uct or other en­tity that that brand name would be bad for. Even though we begged you to look at the Week 547 re­sults so you wouldn’t send in the same an­swers again, the Em­press re­ceived umpteen and a half en­tries — amid a to­tal of some 2,000 — sug­gest­ing that Mi­crosoft would be a bad name for an ED drug, gigolo, etc., and IBM a bad name for a lax­a­tive. There were also dozens of clever other ideas that didn’t get in­di­vid­ual ink be­cause they were of­fered by too many Losers: Sanka as a cruise ship; Planters for a fu­neral home; Jack in the Box for a mor­tu­ary; Sears for a tan­ning sa­lon; iPad for an ac­coun­tant. Some of the names sub­mit­ted — in­clud­ing at least one of the ex­am­ples for this week’s con­test — were called bad names but were ac­tu­ally pretty good ones. It’s a fine line some­times. If you en­tered Week 1140 and think one of your non-ink­ing en­tries might fit the new con­test, sure, send it again.

4th place

One-a-Day is a good name for a vi­ta­min, but not for toi­let pa­per. (Kristin Rah­man, Sil­ver Spring)

3rd place

Dum Dum Pops are a good name for candy but a bad name for a sperm bank. (Jane Auer­bach, Los An­ge­les)

2nd place and the notepad de­pict­ing $20 bills:

Bum­ble Bee is an okay name for tuna but a much too ac­cu­rate one for a pres­i­den­tial de­bate. (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.)

And the win­ner of the Inkin’ Me­mo­rial

Face­book is a good name for a so­cial net­work, but a bad name for the Sports Il­lus­trated Swim­suit Is­sue. (Drew Ben­nett, West Plains, Mo.)

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