New contest for Week 1237: Our alliteracy campaign
Chris Christie’s Copious Corpus Caught in Cocky Comfort on Closed Coast (Original headline, from VanityFair.com: “Chris Christie Caught Sunbathing After Closing All State Beaches Over July Fourth Weekend” Here’s a contest we, amazingly, haven’t done before. It was suggested way back last summer, in those innocent times, by Loser Bill Verkuilen, who’d seen an article about a protest in which environmental activists left piles of fake manure under donkey statues set up at the Democratic National Convention. The Associated Press headline read: “Fracking foes put fake feces under donkey art displays.” Bill’s friend thought the AP should have followed through with the alliteration, suggesting “Foes furnish fake feces for freestanding federal faction furnishings.” Bill countered with “Drilling denouncers deliver dramatic DNC donkey doodoo.” This week: Rewrite an existing headline from any publication, print or line — about something in the
news from July 20 to 31, by using alliteration — starting most of the words with the same letter (or letter sound, as in “Kansas Corn”). Include the original headline and give the publication’s name and date. You may use either news headlines or ads. While not all the words in the headline need begin with the same letter, the effect will probably be weakened if a significant word isn’t with the program, especially if it’s not the first word in the headline, as in the example above. Submit entries at this website: wapo.st/enterinvite1237 (all lowercase). Winner gets the Inkin’ Memorial, the Lincoln statue bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational trophy — one of the last few before we come out with a new design. Second place receives a pair of spandex leggings with the legs’ muscles, tendons, etc., depicted on them. Creeeepy. Donated by 3,009time Loser Dave Prevar. Other runners-up win our “You Gotta Play to Lose” Loser Mug or our Grossery Bag, “I Got a B in Punmanship.” Honorable mentions get one of our lustedafter Loser magnets, “No Childishness Left Behind” or “Magnum Dopus.” First Offenders receive only a smelly treeshaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). Deadline is Monday night, July 31; results published Aug. 20 (online Aug. 17). See general contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/ InvRules. The headline for this week’s results is by Jeff Contompasis; the honorablementions subhead is by William Kennard. Join the Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at on.fb.me/invdev. “Like” Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at bit.ly/inkofday.
THE STYLE CONVERSATIONAL, the Empress’s weekly online column, isn’t happening this week or next, but the E will take questions at firstname.lastname@example.org.