The freeloading ‘99 percent’
Now that the weather has warmed up a bit, it’s time for all us loony-left liberals and aging hippies to dust off our tents and sleeping bags, grab our protest signs, crawl out of our parents’ basements (or wherever else we’ve been freeloading for the past six months) and get back to work. It’s time to Occupy Wall Street again.
Naturally, we’ll want to bring along some contraceptives this time, for those special moments in between trashing public property and defecating on police cars. You can never be too careful.
For all of you college students who think you just can’t afford protection, no worries. It’s all covered under Obamacare, along with condoms, Viagra and all the abortion pills you can swallow. Just ask Georgetown law student Sandra Fluke. You can probably find her at your local Democratic National Committee headquarters or Gloria Allred’s Manhattan law office pushing for more taxpayer-funded goodies. We all have to make a living somehow.
This time us “99 percenters” mean business. You might also want to bring along your “Rules for Radicals” and some medical marijuana, just in case. And don’t forget your Obama-biden 2012 bumper stickers — you know, for all those Chevy Volts that haven’t exploded yet. It’s gonna to be a long, hot summer. J. FRANCIS BERNARD Port St. Lucie, Fla.