Nu­dity at the beach. Quelle hor­reur!

The Washington Times Daily - - METRO - DEB­O­RAH SIM­MONS Deb­o­rah Sim­mons can be con­tacted at dsim­mons@wash­ing­ton­times.com.

The trusty Old Farm­ers Al­manac says June 20 is the day those of us in the North­ern Hemi­sphere can of­fi­cially cel­e­brate the arrival of sum­mer. Are you look­ing for­ward to the break? To en­joy­ing your sum­mer?

Ordinarily, when one sea­son ends and an­other be­gins, jour­nal­ists tend to write about the prover­bial sea­sonal bucket lists. This go ’round, I present the What Not To Do List for Sum­mer 2017 — a very short bucket list of sorts for peo­ple above and be­low the equa­tor.

First up, what not to do at a U.S. beach — es­pe­cially if the beach is in Ocean City, Mary­land. Although the name may im­ply that bound­less op­por­tu­ni­ties are af­forded, there are lim­its to this town that abuts the At­lantic Ocean, and one of those lim­its was drawn in the sand.

In short, it bars women from go­ing top­less.

There are states that al­low women to walk around bare-breasted, though the law may be hitched to a do-not wagon. For ex­am­ple, Alabama doesn’t pro­hibit women from go­ing top­less. How­ever, women are barred from go­ing top­less if their in­tent is to arouse a man who is not her spouse. (Gulp.)

Now, I get the ar­gu­ment that laws should treat women and men equally. But let’s at least ad­mit it: Just like all men shouldn’t pa­rade around in Speedos, not all women should hit the beach top­less — and not all men should go top­less (es­pe­cially while the hairy ch­est vs. the smooth-as-a-baby’sbot­tom ch­est re­mains in de­bate).

Ocean City went so far as to draw lines in the sand, warn­ing that women who fail to wear fully opaque tops will be fined $1,000.

If you don’t want to cut into you salt wa­ter taffy fund, gals can ex­er­cise their top­less free­dom at other beachie spots, such as Austin, Texas, or Madi­son, Wis­con­sin, both of which are far from the madding crowds of the Eastern Shore.

In other words, ladies, feel free to dress like you might work at Hoot­ers and even act like you worked at Tony So­prano’s Bada Bing! Just keep re­mind­ing your­self that top­less is a state of mind when you’re in Ocean City.

And speak­ing of state of mind, let’s call a mora­to­rium on hate, dis­gust, name-call­ing, snip­ing and vi­o­lence — or take a break this sum­mer and re­sist the temp­ta­tion to re­sist.

Stand­ing for re­sis­tance 24/7 means you can­not, you do not, stand for any­thing else.

You can still be up­set that Don­ald Trump beat Hil­lary Rod­ham Clin­ton. But of­fer so­lu­tions or make rec­om­men­da­tions in­stead of just rais­ing Cain.

Think U.S. im­mi­gra­tion laws should be loos­ened or Amer­ica should throw a mat for “hud­dled masses” yearn­ing to share Amer­ica’s free­doms? Help put your prof­fer on the ta­ble.

Break away, if only un­til Septem­ber, from the name-call­ing and the snip­ing — both the ver­bal and vi­o­lent sort — and whether you stand to the right or to the left on pol­icy is­sues.

For in­stance, on Thurs­day, the day after her col­leagues were threat­ened by a sniper’s at­tack on a base­ball field, Demo­crat Nancy Pelosi said in a press brief­ing, “I don’t even want to go into the pres­i­dent of the United States in terms of the lan­guage he has used.”

But then she be­gan snip­ing like the sniper, James Hodgkin­son, who had been snip­ing on­line at Pres­i­dent Trump and other Repub­li­cans. Hodgkin­son proved that ac­tions speak louder than words.

Do not waste the sum­mer gin­ning up Trump­gate. Have you even con­sid­ered what hap­pens to Amer­ica, your tax dol­lars and other na­tions’ rap­port if Mr. Trump is evicted from the White House?

For sure, there’s more to con­sider than the line of suc­ces­sion.

Again, re­sist the temp­ta­tion to re­sist.

En­joy your sum­mer.

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