Forget politics, summer’s heat is now and real
I’ll suffer no shame in dropping the politics from this column this week.
It is just too darn hot. Hot, as in the outside temperatures, not political persuasions.
Readers tell me they like this kind of break from world-shaking affairs. So enjoy.
To stay cool this summer, 50 ways to do it:
1. Don’t lose your cool at others.
2. Keep your cool — all the time.
3. Rise early and enjoy the cool, pre-dawn time.
4. Run though that yard sprinkler. You are 5 years old again.
5. Eat a really big vanilla ice cream cone.
6. Crunch up some big ice cubes — now chow down on the result.
7. Seek the shade of a really old tree.
8. Wear seersucker (if you got it). Linen if you dare.
9. Catch a breeze and stay with it.
10. Chill a big watermelon, an Arkansas Black Diamond, and then dive right in for the delicious icy treat.
11. Now, eat another big ice cream cone — make this one chocolate.
12. Walk far out into the open spaces late at night — look up at the stars.
13. Turn up the ceiling fan to high.
14. Read, “Polar Express” and other weather-titled tomes.
15. Cube up a big cantaloupe. Set it in the fridge. Eat it later. Yum.
16. Pour yourself a big glass of sweet tea. Let it set till it is indeed ice cold and the glass is sweating. Now it is ready. So are you.
17. Key Lime Pie.
18. Drink a big RC Cola, if you can find one.
19. A cold fruit salad sounds really nice.
20. Break out the loose-fitting Hawaiian shirts.
21. Toss away those hot shoes — sandals are in.
22. Take naps in the heat of the day.
23. Remember the deep and frigid winter snows.
24. Banana pudding sure sounds good.
25. Start your Christmas card list.
26. Soak those tired feet in cool water, toss in an ice cube or two.
27. Break out the talcum powder for those itchy spots.
28. Eat a whole peach with the juice running down your chin.
29. Wear that big floppy brimmed hat — everywhere.
30. Always remember — it is hotter in Fort Smith.
31. Read the magazines first. Bills, look at them later.
32. Go to the public library. It’s always cool in there.
33. Turn off the TV and turn on the jazz music.
34. Pick the guitar. If you don’t, listen to someone who does.
35. Have a cold one. A real cold one.
36. Fan yourself with a hand-held fan — if you can find one.
37. Retell an old joke that makes folks laugh.
38. Eat cold fried chicken.
39. Encourage the neighbors to crank some homemade ice cream — you will sure help eat it.
40. Wear a smile. That always cools down some folks.
41. Run out into a summer rain. Let it soak you down.
42. Go to the area pools and water parks.
43. Drive out in the country with the windows down.
44. Eat a spoonful of local honey. Sweet and cool.
45. Make a big tomato sandwich — mayo, white bread and a big, red, juicy center of tomato.
46. Arrive at the office a little late. Leave a little early.
47. Eschew socks, men — when you can. Hose are out — even knee highs for the gals.
48. Soak down that midsized hand towel. Drape it around the back of your neck.
49. Get a really short haircut. Feel the breeze you were missing.
50. And lastly, chill out. Summer will soon be over.
Next week, back to politics.