I received a great new job offer that I would love to take, but I would have to relocate to a new state. The job comes with a higher title and salary, but I think my husband will be reluctant to make the move because he’d also have to find a new job. How should I approach this conversation with him?
Gabriella Rowe, head of the Village School, a private school in Houston, TX, went through a similar situation when she relocated her family from New York. She explains that you and your husband should first have an honest conversation about the things “sacred” to your relationship— like location or proximity to your extended family.
Next, run down all of the pros and cons of making the move with your husband, says Philpott- Sanders. Discuss how the move would positively impact your career and family’s quality of life. But also take into account factors such as having to settle the kids into a new school district or how it might be difficult for your husband to find a new job in this location.
Approach the conversation with an open mind and be ready to talk about compromises, says Philpott- Sanders. These conversations can be tough, so try to stay calm and focused on the overall goal: finding win-wins for your entire family. “Prepare for the discussion by making a list of compromises you are willing and able to make, such as adjusting your work schedule to accommodate family activities, and ask your husband to do the same.” You also might want to take the time to find any perks for your husband in the new location— such as places to pursue his favorite hobbies—to help sweeten the deal. Good luck!
It’s tough, but moving can be an exciting adventure for the whole family.