Bring the house down with these great Christ­mas jokes

Central Queensland News - - 2017 CHRISTMAS CATALOGUE -

Who de­liv­ers presents to baby sharks at Christ­mas?

Santa Jaws

What says Oh Oh Oh?

Santa walk­ing back­wards

Who is Santa’s favourite singer?

Elf-is Pres­ley

What did Santa say to the smoker?

Please don’t smoke, it’s bad for my elf

Where do elves go to dance?

Christ­mas Balls

What type of shoes does Santa wear when he trav­els on a train?


What do rein­deer hang on their Christ­mas trees?


Did Ru­dolph go to school?

No. He was elf-taught

What hap­pened to the turkey at Christ­mas?

It got gob­bled

How do snow­men get around?

They ride an ici­cle

What song do you sing at a snow­man’s birth­day party?

Freeze a jolly good fel­low

How does Good King Wences­las like his piz­zas?

One that’s deep pan, crisp and even

Who hides in the bak­ery at Christ­mas?

A mince spy

What do an­gry mice send to each other at Christ­mas?

Cross mouse cards

What is the best Christ­mas present in the world?

A bro­ken drum, you just can’t beat it

What do you get if you cross a bell with a skunk?

What do you get if you eat Christ­mas dec­o­ra­tions?


What hap­pened to the man who stole an ad­vent cal­en­dar?

He got 25 days

What do you get if you cross a bell with a skunk?

Jingle smells

What do you call an elf who sings?

A wrap­per!


YOU’RE JOK­ING: Doug Reis shares a Merry Christ­mas joke with Vicki Hy­land at the Na­tional Se­niors Christ­mas break-up.

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