GHOST NO MORE!
COSMO’S GHOSTBUSTING CONT RACT
FROM THIS DAY FORTH, I, _____, pledge to leave no correspondence incomplete – even if my heart and vagina have shut out the sender like a steel trap. Through iOS updates and the evolution of the F-boy species, I will respond to every text, if only to say, “We’re not the best match.” If the typing isn’t easy,
I’ll remind myself that although closure can be tricky, in refusing to virtually disappear off the face of a person’s phone, I’m doing my part to make the digital world a less savage place to date.
SIGNED, _____ (A VERYMUCH-ALIVE HUMAN AND REFORMED FLAKE).
GUILTY OF GOING MIA? BOO TO YOU!