GROOMING
Popping Jesse’s day spa cherry.
I’VE ALWAYS BEEN SKEPTICAL of the beauty industry and, by extension, spa treatments. In the same way I don’t believe you’re going to get fit by sitting your ass on a vibration plate, I don’t believe a facial will whisk you on a time travel journey to your past. Just the word rejuvenation can carry a smarmy association with the next miracle product or supplement that promises boundless energy, baby butt skin and a brand new car.
I used to work at a Madison Avenue boutique that sold a lotion with an anti-ageing property supposedly extracted from a rare lichen that clings to the crags of one remote, uninhabitable island. I’ve read too many press releases not to be a cynic. But I’ve also seen the customers who regularly bought that lotion and, trust me, they stayed every bit as shriveled as that lichen.
So when I was asked to write a story on what’s hot in the happening world of men’s spa and beauty treatments, I was understandably dubious. I was also curious because I know that men younger than me are now, more than ever, enjoying this domain which was once considered that of only women and the aged. I wanted to find out whether my reservations could be overcome and my faith in the beauty industry restored. Rejuvenated, even.
I sat down on the lounge of Millk Medi Spa in Sydney with Peter, a gorgeous paramedical skin expert and beauty therapist at Sydney’s only male-owned day spa. This first visit was a consultation, as Peter wanted to know what I was most interested in experiencing. Instead of simply selling an impressive list of services (including hair removal, cocoon baths, facials, microdermabrasion, peels, spray tans, lasers), he wanted to make sure I had something done that I actually wanted done. I really appreciated that. And now that I was here and faced with the question, what didn’t I want done? I wasn’t sure where to begin (the beginning?), but my first thought was of the pigmentation on my face, something he also noticed. “I can get rid of that for you,” he said.
There is noticeable pigmentation on my forehead and cheekbones which gets worse in summer and lightens each winter, although never completely. A dermatologist told me the condition, melasma, is activated by sun exposure but is actually hormonal and often affects pregnant women (I have no idea what he was trying to suggest!) but guys get this, too. The dermatologist, and also the internet, said that even if I stayed out of the sun, nothing could effectively correct the discolouration. Not creams or potions, not even lasers. Yet here was Peter confidently reassuring me that he could get rid of it. It helped that his skin was
f lawless, but he also showed images from his computer of similar spots disappearing and skin evening out completely after just a few fractional (Fraxel) laser treatments.
In addition to solving pigment problems, the laser was said to offer other benefits: it stimulates collagen, improves sun damage, smoothness and even fine lines. It sounded like real-world photoshop and I very suddenly wanted to believe in such a miracle. My primary concern was not that it wouldn’t deliver (at my age, I’m prepared to gamble), but invasive beauty procedures have been known to leave people looking like some unfortunate reconstruction has been going on. I used to work with a man who regularly came into the office with grisly red slashes across his face. He said he was undergoing facial rejuvenation treatments; we wondered if he’d been run over by a rototiller.
I worried I would be hideously disfigured by a laser vaporising my face. Peter assured me that with advances in technology (and Millk uses the latest in lasers) there is no downtime, slashing or scarring. In the end, it didn’t even hurt. Because t hey are so effective and no longer require an emergency holiday hideaway in Phuket, spa treatments li ke t his are more popular t han ever, and attract a wide client base. At Millk, groups of friends regularly f ly up from Melbourne for spa and shopping weekends. And it’s no longer just a girl t hing. Or even a gay t hing. These days, straight men are, apparently, t he most open to tr ying new t hings. FYI, Peter claims he has performed more “manzilians” than anyone in t he city, with many a straight client’s opening remark being, “My girlfriend said I should tr y t his out…”
For my laser treatments, a numbing cream was applied to my face and I was left to chill out on a comfy spa bed with ambient music. Later I was outfitted with protective goggles while pinpoints of light penetrated the surface of my skin. Numbed up, I could barely feel the burn and it was over in less than fifteen minutes. I was given ice packs to cool off, and Cosmedics lightweight 30+SPF sunscreen (and told to stay out of direct sunlight). Five minutes later, I was back to work and nobody was the wiser. My face was red, like it had been sunburned, but nothing obscene.
The following day my skin was less red but it felt coarse. The patches of melasma, however, were even darker than before. I was warned that this is how it works and, sure enough, four or five days later the dead skin sloughed off and underneath was far lighter and more eventoned. It was also a lot smoother, as advertised. I went back for a total of three treatments, each separated by about a month, until any pigmentation was imperceptible. I was not the only one impressed. Friends complimented me on my clear skin and one even asked why I hadn’t taken care of it sooner! This was, of course, the moment I became a convert.
In between sessions, I couldn’t resist heading in for Millk’s famous un-stress facial with multi-layers of cleansing and moisturising (so successfully un-stressful I fell asleep). Then before taking a big holiday to Europe, I hit Millk up for a Tuscan tan. I’m used to spotting spray tans in obvious oompa loompa orange, but this formula is purple-based, which eradicates the orange-y edge and left me with a natural-looking bronze (with optional tanline) that lasted until my actual holiday tan caught up and took over.
It being only natural for the converted to evangelise, I’ve already spread the word and sent friends. Modern spa treatments are effective and it’s not even so much about looking like a whole new person, but feeling that happy afterglow of having done something nice for yourself. Of course, the more you indulge the more you want. After Mardi Gras weekend, I’m booked in for a detoxifying mud wrap in Millk’s state-of-the-art, temperaturecontrolled cocoon. My boyfriend insists I try it!
Day spas are no longer just a girl thing. Or even a gay thing. These days, straight men are, apparently, the most open to trying new things.