romantic getaways (for non-romantic types)
Lake Como, ITALY
When you arrive at Grand Hotel Tremezzo, an hour’s drive from Milan, it’s easy to see how this palace became known as Lake Como’s “grande dame”. With a time-honoured nod to the splendour of its formative Belle Époque days, the five-star hotel is Art Nouveau to the core.
The property has been a regular fixture for the Greta Garbos of the world since it was established back in 1910, yet seasonally updated facilities keep it feeling fresh and modern. Current co-owner and CEO Valentina De Santis has helped fuse the charm of yesteryear with all the prerequisites of a contemporary grand hotel, with features including the exclusive “T Beach” with Pommery champagne bar, rooftop suites by Italian designer Venelli Kramer, an expanded award-winning day spa within the adjoining 18th-century Villa Emilia... you get the gist. Even better, all the 90 rooms and suites offer guests unimpeachable views of the lake or the hotel’s century-old 20,000sqm park and gardens, and each of the suites comes with its own private terrace, outdoor jacuzzi and butler service.
Thanks to a collaboration with the biggest name in modern Italian cuisine, Gualtiero Marchesi, the in-house La Terrazza Restaurant is a major drawcard where you and your partner can be treated to creative, locally sourced dishes that put a focus on fresh seafood. After your meal, head to the Sala Musica for a digestif in one of its Alla Moda-hued armchairs. It’s here the original 1900s lights and floors beguile, and as you sip on a limoncello, you’ll find yourself mesmerised if not by your S/O, then by the expanse of Lago di Como, like so many writers, artists and Prussian princesses before you (if only the walls could talk).
Amboseli National Park, KENYA
Intimacy typically comes with privacy, and Satao Elerai Camp has this in spades – but do expect to share your quiet, romantic moments with the occasional roaring elephant. Up close. Prepare also for the constant gaze of mighty Mount Kilimanjaro.
Located just outside Amboseli National Park in a 5,000-acre private conservancy owned by the local Maasai community, Satao Elerai is a poster child for sustainable tourism. Built atop a volcanic rock outcrop, entirely from natural materials, the camp oozes a rugged minimalism. It’s a serene contrast to the excitement of arrival – in a private plane smaller than a dining table, followed by a bumpy ride in an open-sided Jeep.
The camp’s open-air dining area, well-stocked bar and infinity pool look out to a waterhole 20m away. Amboseli means “dry and salty” in the local Maa language, and the open-air bathtub is a magnet for animals of every kind. Giraffes, zebras, impalas, elands and buffalos are all regulars but they vanish quickly when the main attraction, a herd of African elephants, stomp in to drink and bathe. Lucky guests may even see cheetahs or lions, while guided game drives into the main park offer the chance for more sightings.
An exclusive affair, accommodation comprises just 12 tents and five lodges. Choose the former and forget any bad camping memories – this is glamping and then some. Think of a gigantic field tent, three metres high and pitched on a wooden floor. The resulting room is filled with plush, rustic furnishings and a waisthigh bed, plus an attached fully equipped luxury bathroom with pipinghot water to wash the dust away. The toilet even looks out over bushland, for bonus game views. Ultimately, only the best tent-like elements are preserved: the light flapping of canvas as you and your partner drift off to sleep and the joy of unzipping your front door onto a glorious mountain vista (and a pair of watchful zebras).
Santa Barbara, CALIFORNIA
Los Angeles is fun and all, but throngs of tourists and hour-long drives to get from point A to point B can put a certain damper on things. Drive two hours north and stay instead in Santa Barbara, a postcard-pretty city between the Santa Ynez Mountains and the sea that’s steeped in history thanks to its Spanish colonial heritage (evident everywhere you look courtesy of all the white stucco and red roof tiles).
Perched high on the hills, away from the bustle of downtown (but still within walking distance), Belmond El Encanto is a local icon. Opened in 1918, it was renovated in 2013 at a budget of $134 million, so these days, while the decor hasn’t lost any of its old-world charm, the hotel has that fresh, we-really-lookafter-the-place appeal. Stay in one of the bungalows and coming home at the end of a long day to lie by the heated pool (with views so unbelievable you’ll have your boo on Insta-husband duties despite explicitly saying you’d never be that couple) feels like exactly that... home. But, of course, your pillows at home aren’t monogrammed, are they? These ones are, with your initial – it’s one of the little luxuries this place prides itself on. Well, that and each bungalow’s bathroom – they’re huge, for one, with floor-to-ceiling marble, the biggest rainfall showerhead you have ever seen and Etro products to suds up in.
Wander up to the main clubhouse in the morning to take breakfast on the large, open deck where 360-degree views of the Pacific await. Order huevos rancheros, a Mexican specialty, and a bellini before you head to the spa for a couple’s massage, or go it alone and send him away to work off last night’s cocktails at the gym, where stationary bikes sit out on the terrace instead of cooped up in a windowless room. Genius.
Megali Ammos, MYKONOS
While it’s true that there’s absolutely no shortage of luxurious hotels to call home on Greece’s most fabulous party island, this one – part of the Leading Hotels Of The World stable – is tough to pass up. It’s all in the name, really – “bill and coo” is an expression that implies affection and whispered sweet nothings. Of course, as a non-romantic you couldn’t care less, but the thought that went into the name shows how much detail is valued here. At your request, they can provide a personal assistant, trainer, even shopper. There’s a luxury transfer service available, yacht charter, private jet. Much like Burger King, you can have it your way.
Close enough to town to make a late-night gyros run an easily accomplished mission, but secluded enough for you to hear only the insects buzzing when you finally turn in for the night, the 30-suite hotel looks out over Megali Ammos Bay. Its design is a contemporary take on the Cycladic aesthetic, with traditional white walls and pale timber furnishings.
You needn’t wander to Little Venice to watch the sunset either – it looks just as epic from your private verandah or from beside the infinity pool, which has scattered tiny LED lights at the bottom to create an effect akin to the night sky. Recline on the poolside loungers, Aperol spritz in hand, and watch the sky turn pink and orange before you walk the 10 steps to the open-air restaurant that runs alongside the pool area.
The service is a major drawcard here, too; the staff are never far away when you need them, but maintain a stealthy distance the rest of the time. Upon check-in, you’ll get a mobile phone to call reception from anywhere on the island, or your room, whether you want advice on whether Kiki’s Tavern really is worth the wait (we say it is) or just need someone to show you how to use your room’s Sonos speaker.