OLEKSANDR ZINCHENKO BERATING A LIZARD & 22 OTHER THINGS WE LOVE
This month, Kevin-prince Boateng moonlights as a rapper. What’s not to like?
Michael Essien turning up to play in a dads’ Monday night eight-a-side at Hampton Academy. Our sources there say he barely got out of first gear.
The passion of fans at the Africa Cup of Nations, both in Egypt for the tournament itself and in Europe, too.
FFT witnessed packed-out Algerian cafes on south London’s Old Kent Road going mad for Riyad Mahrez’s 95th-minute semi-final winner against Nigeria; a couple of weeks earlier during our expedition to Luxembourg, we also saw Algerians exuberantly celebrating on car roofs in northern France. Zut alors! The Jim Holton biography Six Foot Two, Eyes Of Blue. Wiki height? 6ft 1in.
Kevin-prince Boateng adopting the name ‘Prin$$ Boateng’ and releasing a new rap track called Bella Vita (above). Youri Djorkaeff’s son – midfielder Oan – signing for St Mirren.
Doncaster Rovers randomly inviting 1995 world snooker finalist Nigel Bond (who’s not from Doncaster) to be the star attraction at their annual pre-season open day.
Yokohama FC putting their faith in youth - signing 41-year-old former Celtic star Shunsuke Nakamura to team up with Kazuyoshi Miura, who’s incredibly still playing at 52.
A random photo we found of Peter Beardsley at the 1986 World Cup (above). Sometimes picture research throws up the odd surprise!
Stephen Darby’s old clubs Liverpool and Bradford City playing a friendly to raise funds for his charitable foundation, after he was diagnosed with motor neurone disease. The Twitter account Footballers With Animals (@ftbllrswanimals), featuring Manchester City’s Oleksandr Zinchenko shouting at a lizard (pictured top left). Ukrainian international defender Artem Fedetskyi standing for parliament. If only England players would follow suit - Harry Maguire for Chancellor of the Exchequer, the campaign starts here.
Bolton Wanderers fans starting a petition to name a stand ‘The Big Wheatz Stand’ in an attempt to persuade David Wheater to stay, after the defender had gone four months without wages.
Steve Mcnulty playing on with York City at 35, despite looking like he was straight out of an over 55s veteran team when he came on for Tranmere in last season’s League Two play-off final. There’s hope for everyone. Even us. Neil Ruddock agreeing to go on Celebrity Masterchef.
Louie Barry, a 16-year-old from Birmingham signing for Barcelona. At that age, we’d just discovered cider.
The retiring Peter Crouch. Star of a brilliant podcast, and a better goal-per-minute ratio than Gary Lineker, Michael Owen and Alan Shearer for England. Whadda guy. Forest Green Rovers’ new bamboo kit (top left). They’re green, you know.
Dover Athletic signing a French winger called Nassim L’ghoul. A terrifying development for all National League full-backs – he’ll be feasting on their bodies very soon.
Real Madrid wanting to appoint Francesco Totti as their new ambassador, despite the fact that he never actually played for Los Blancos.
A man walking through Norwich city centre in full Ipswich kit as part of his stag do - Birmingham’s Lukas Jutkiewicz recently had to wear a full Birmingham strip with his own name on it during his pre-wedding trip. Chris Sweeney’s book Mad Dog Gravesen. A true maverick.
Marine FC putting house numbers on the perimeter fencing of their ground, so they know which door to knock on when fetching balls blootered into adjacent gardens. Clever. Pristine pitches on the opening day of a new season. Absolute perfection.
THINGS WE DON’T LIKE
The way Mike Ashley has run Newcastle United into the ground.