The noughties were a haven of ineptitude in the Premier League, as the bar for its worst points tally was lowered four times.

Watford kicked everything off with a 24- point haul in 1999- 00, achieving as many victories ( three) in their first eight games as they did in the next 30, following successive promotions under Graham Taylor. Their successors, though, had no such excuses.

Sunderland came next in 2002- 03, sacking the long- serving Peter Reid after nine matches and replacing him with Howard Wilkinson – last spotted in a club dugout at Leeds in 1996. An unpopular option from the start, Sergeant Wilko’s bizarre methods included grasping stinging nettles and showing his squad David Attenborough documentaries about geese – although they did lead to Sunderland’s final victory of the campaign at Anfield. There was just one problem: that came on December 15.

Having netted a paltry 21 goals for their 19 points – in a season where they’d also leaked three own goals in a single game at home to Charlton Athletic – the Black Cats drowned.

Luckily for them, in 2005- 06 along came… er, Sunderland. Having made it back up at the second attempt under boss Mick Mccarthy, the Wearsiders signed 12 players that summer to avoid a repeat. In a way, they achieved that – by somehow getting even worse. Their £ 1.8m frontman Jon Stead managed one goal in 30 outings; fellow pre- season arrival Anthony Le Tallec top- scored with a mighty five. Not so astonishingly, they lost a joint- record 29 of their 38 Premier League matches and ended the campaign on a dismal 15 points, a full 23 adrift of safety.

Fortunately, they didn’t have to wait long for Derby to show them how things were done with a scarcely believable 11- point term in 2007- 08. Yes, 11.

“David Moyes called me and said not to go,” Paul Jewell told in 2017, reflecting on his decision to succeed Billy Davies at Pride Park in late 2007. “David said Everton had played them not long ago and that Derby wouldn’t win another game all season. I laughed it off... but it turned out to be true.”

The Midlanders’ sole win came at home to Newcastle on September 17, and they ended up 24 points shy of 19th- placed Birmingham. Derby scored 20 goals, conceded 89 and were relegated by March 29 – all league records. “The players knew they weren’t just short of Premier League quality, but hopelessly short,” summarised Jewell. Grim.

It might not have been the best idea to dress up for a jolly party