Best & Worst: Ipswich Town

Rich Woodward, of the Blue Monday podcast, celebrates Weah- like wonders and triumphant arm- wrestles

XI

BEST: Sadly our greatest era was just before I was born, so of the players I’ve seen: Richard Wright, Aaron Cresswell, Tony Mowbray, Jason de Vos, Mauricio Taricco, Kieron Dyer, Matt Holland, Jim Magilton, Jon Walters, Marcus Stewart, Darren Bent.

WORST: Andy Marshall, Amir Karic, Piotr Malarczyk, Georges Santos, Drissa Diallo, Ulrich Le Pen, Nigel Reo- Coker, Lee Martin, Lee Chapman, Paul Taylor, Cameron Stewart.

PLAYER

B: Kevin Beattie [ right] is repeatedly acknowledged as so, but Stewart is my personal favourite.

W: Mark Fish and Balint Bajner failed to last beyond 45 minutes in their first starts for the club. Marlon Harewood somehow diverted an open goal- bound effort onto a post and wide – defying both logic and physics.

MOMENT

B: Dare I say the recent US takeover? It could be our best chance of making a concerted effort not to be mediocre in almost two decades. On the pitch, beating Inter at Portman Road in 2001 was a special night.

W: Confirmation of relegation to the third tier for the first time since 1957 in 2019, with little more than a whimper. The fans deserved better.

GAME

B: Beating Bolton 5- 3 after extra time in the 2000 play- off semis: eight goals, three penalties ( one saved), two red cards and a pitch invasion at full- time. Sam Allardyce is still having a hissy fit over referee Barry Knight’s officiating.

W: Losing 3- 1 to Southampton in 2002. We were closer to mid- table than the drop zone before kick- off – then Chris Marsden waltzed through our defence, panic set in and relegation followed.

SEASON

B: 1980- 81 without question. That side deserved much more than ‘ just’ a UEFA Cup for all its skill and exertion. W: 2018- 19. Relegation felt inevitable from September onwards.

GOAL

B: Fabian Wilnis’ shot past Fabien Barthez in our first home game of 2000- 01 remains the loudest roar I’ve heard at Portman Road, and set up the rest of that season perfectly.

W: Keith Andrews’ pair at Barnsley in 2011 – they turned that game but kept Paul Jewell in a job for another year.

SIGNING

B: Giovani dos Santos [ below] on loan from Spurs in 2009 – too good for the Championship. He knew it, we knew it. W: The £ 1.5 million spent on Peterborough’s Paul Taylor yielded just one goal in 25 games. He’s tough to beat.

MANAGER

B: Bobby Robson, with Alf Ramsey just behind. I think we win that game of Top Trumps with most teams.

W: Paul Hurst was out of his depth and lasted five months, while Pauls Jewell and Lambert pretended to know what they were doing, but were clueless. Is it a ‘ Paul’ thing? ( No pressure, Mr Cook...)

CHANT

B: Tony Mowbray had a decent one to the tune of the Hokey Cokey. It ended, “Arm up, flag up, you’re offside.”

W: The trend of self- deprecating stuff like, “How s** t must you be?”, almost always followed up by conceding, can go straight in the bin.

CULT HERO

B: Mick Stockwell [ below] featured in almost every outfield position over 15 years, scoring a George Weah- esque goal against Wimbledon in 1993- 94. W: Larsen Toure’s 11 games included him booting a corner out of play. He threw his top into the crowd after normal time of a cup tie at Doncaster, then had to retrieve it ready for extra time...

HARD MAN

B: Beattie is believed to have beaten Sylvester Stallone in an arm wrestle while filming iconic 1981 flick Escape To Victory. Rambo wasn’t best pleased.

W: Grant Holt ( for ‘ them lot’) wearing his wrestling outfit.

FACIAL HAIR

B: [ John] Warky’s ’ tache.

W: Roy Keane’s salt and pepper beard. A physical manifestation of his internal torment as Ipswich tumbled down the Championship table.