Thalia-Star and Jarrod Dann

Jarrod Dann would like you to know he didn’t get into the funeral industry because of some morbid fetish. He was actually drawn to the office-y side of being a crematorium manager: looking after finances, putting together a funeral service – that sort of thing. His interest in the job developed after meeting his now-wife Thalia-star. She’d only just begun working at a small Brisbane funeral home when they started dating. “I’d always wanted to work in funerals,” she explains. “It’s interesting and rewarding, because you can make a difference in someone’s life during a hard time.”

Not long after, Thalia-star introduced Jarrod to the business owners at a Christmas party, and before they knew it, the pair was sharing their nine-to-five – Thalia-star as funeral director in the main office and Jarrod off at the crematorium, a “massive castle” on rural farmland. Thalia-star’s role involves a bit of everything: she’s the first port of call for family members, guides people through the funeral process, and organises for bodies to go to the crematorium. Jarrod handles the actual cremation, while also taking care of paperwork, funeral logistics (like catering) and financials.

Working in separate spaces means they don’t often run into each other during the day – a pro for their relationship, as far as they’re concerned. Jarrod tells a cautionary tale of a couple he once worked with: “They argued constantly because he was her superior and she couldn’t hack being told what to do. Basically, they were engaged when I started working there and divorced when I left, so I think it’s good we don’t work in the same office.

I’m a bit of a hard-arse.” Thalia-star laughs: “I love Jarrod, but it’s true. I’m a ‘go with the flow’ type of person and Jarrod’s more ‘go with the exact paperwork’. We did set ground rules, though: when I’m in his office, I listen to what he says. If he’s in mine, he listens to me.”

According to the Danns, work–life balance isn’t a thing in the funeral industry – families get in contact at all hours of the day and night, and you just have to grin and bear it. “At the end of the day, they’re grieving – their pain is far worse than you having to miss lunch,” Jarrod says. When their workday is done, Thalia-star and Jarrod also team up on an after-hours on-call service, where they transport bodies to the mortuary as needed. “If someone dies, whether it’s at 7pm or 2am, we have to get out of bed, put on our suits and go,” Thalia-star explains. The job used to be a bit of an inconvenience when she did it alone (she’d ditch Jarrod midway through Christmas and New Year’s parties), but since becoming on-call partners, they’ve used it as an opportunity to squeeze in quality time. “We turn it into a date,” Thalia-star says. “We make the most of it and go, ‘OK, pick up a body at six, get dinner at seven.’”

With few people who understand the unique pressures of the funeral industry, they’re grateful to have each other to lean on in tough times. It certainly helps to have someone who can chuckle over the absurdity of dark situations. “We could literally be all dressed up for a date, then picking up a bag of maggots at the end of the night,” Thalia-star says. “But work is more enjoyable when I get to do it with my best friend.”