KEEP IT UN­DER WRAPS

IT IS ALL WELL AND GOOD TO BE YOURSELF, JUST MAKE SURE YOU KEEP THE LESS SO­PHIS­TI­CATED PARTS TO YOURSELF

Fraser Coast Chronicle - - WEEKEND - ON A LIGHTER NOTE WORDS: GREG BRAY Find Greg Bray at greg­bray­writer.word press.com or Face­book: Greg Bray – Writer

Folks, from what I can tell, we’re all bro­ken in some small but vi­tal way. It’s ei­ther that or I’m not hang­ing out with nor­mal peo­ple.

Still, even the most got-it-all-to­gether, stock stan­dard hu­man be­ings have their quirks and foibles.

Heaven knows I’ve got a few, plus I’m fairly cer­tain my Long Suf­fer­ing Wife could pro­vide you with an ex­ten­sive list of the things I do that make her com­mit vi­o­lence in her heart on a daily ba­sis; prob­a­bly.

But, for the most part, like ev­ery­one else I keep the re­ally weird stuff well hid­den. I mean se­ri­ously well hid­den. Es­pe­cially when I meet some­one for the first time. Be­cause the last thing I want any­one to see is what I’m re­ally like be­fore I’ve had the chance to ex­plain why I’m like I am.

Not that I un­der­stand it my­self but, if given the choice, I’ll al­ways present my out­go­ing, happy-go-lucky self to the world, rather than the anxiety-rid­dled, fret­ful, over-think­ing wreck that I am.

We all would, and of­ten do.

But I’ve been read­ing a book on the topic, which has also been an­noy­ing my wife. Ap­par­ently nor­mal peo­ple don’t lie in bed of a night read­ing while nois­ily munch­ing their way through a large bag of potato chips.

She also had quite a lot to say about the crumbs, the bright­ness of my bed­side lamp and the fact I was prop­ping my book against the back of her head.

Any­way, af­ter she’d stomped off to the spare room I con­tin­ued to pon­der the sub­ject of pre­sent­ing our best, bro­ken selves to the world.

Per­haps, on first dates, young suit­ors should be­gin with a frank dis­cus­sion of the nu­mer­ous ways they are slightly nuts.

If the other per­son doesn’t run shriek­ing from the room then se­ri­ous con­sid­er­a­tion can be given to building an on­go­ing re­la­tion­ship.

It would save a lot of nasty sur­prises down the track.

The trick is not to go all ‘Amer­i­can’ and hor­rify strangers with graphic ac­counts of our bowel move­ments or re­cent sur­gi­cal pro­ce­dures.

Ob­vi­ously, we have to have some secrets.

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