Toughest battle

RORY Nicol felt a sense of hollowness deep inside. With his father’s last gasp for breath, months of pain amid the insidious grip of cancer was over. But an emptiness and a lifetime of pain was set to start for the Newcomb senior coach. Russell Nicol died on January 5 following a six-month fight with a rare and aggressive cancer squamous cell carcinoma (SCC). He left behind Heather, his wife of 30 years, and three children. “Dad leaves a hole in our lives that will never be filled,” Rory said, choking back tears. “I always had that support. No matter how old you are, to have your old man in your life . . . He was there for everything, whether it be buying a new car, banking, mortgages and advice on anything and everything. “He was such a vibrant person and he was the life of the party and that’s what we miss. “He leaves a massive hole in my life, that’s for sure, and it’s hard to see Mum and my little sister in so much pain — and my wife and kids are doing it hard.” In July last year, Russell was diagnosed as having a tumour on his pelvis. The 55-yeard-old received a “strong dose” of radiation therapy, but to no avail. “It only contained the tumour, it didn’t do anything,” Rory lamented. “Basically there was nothing they could do for him. It was a rare cancer than men typically get in their ’90s — and they can’t treat it.” After multiple surgeries, the outlook for Russell was suddenly bleak. “He got lymphedema and couldn’t walk and had all of his lymph nodes removed from his legs,” Rory said. “They were hoping they could shrink the tumour on the pelvis and maybe do a bone graft but the radiation didn’t shrink it. “It was fairly aggressive and it got a hold of him. The swelling with the lymphedema went right up to his armpits and he ended up almost drowning on the fluid on his lungs. “He was just gone. We watched him die in the Grace McKellar Centre.” Rory recalls the day when his “world came crashing down” like it was yesterday. He was preparing to coach his beloved Newcomb in its Round 17 clash against Drysdale at Grinter Reserve when he picked up the phone.

“You always hold hope, but deep down you feel sick in the guts,” Rory said of the news.

“You’re dreading the worst but you’ve got to be positive. Dad was positive until the very end, so you can’t feel sorry for yourself. “I couldn’t imagine life without him.” Russell, a life member of North Geelong Football Club, would have been 56 last Friday.

He was a real character and had a “zest for life”.

With his days numbered, a father and son shared a special bond. And it proved to be the last.

“We spent Christmas Day in the Grace McKellar Centre,” Rory recalled.

“We had a quaddie on New Year’s Eve and I cooked a steak and we had a couple of scotches. I went back in there on New Year’s Day and he was slipping in and out of a coma. “He died on the fifth of January. “Mum and Dad had their 30th wedding anniversary a month ago and it’s his 56th birthday today (yesterday) . . . it’s just been horrible, mate.”

With a new season at the Power on the horizon, Rory spent the “whole summer” in and out of the Grace McKellar Centre, spending several nights by his Dad’s bedside.

He made endless phone calls in a bid to improve the struggling list, but continued to hit brick walls.

“You’ve got to be really resilient when you’re coaching Newcomb and you’re not winning games of footy,” Rory said.

“It’s a real challenge, especially when you’re vulnerable and you’re not as strong as you normally are. I’d just go off to footy and look after Mum. My family needs me more than anyone else.

“My wife has been incredibly supportive and she was the one who looked after the kids and drive to-and-from the hospital. She was really close with Dad as well.”

In his second season as coach, Rory questioned whether he would remain at the helm in the wake of his father’s passing. Because, in the end, football was just a game.

“I was pretty close to pulling the pin . . . walking away,” Rory said.

“I just couldn’t do it to (president) Damian Mahoney, to be honest. And not just Damian, but the Newcomb people.

“I thought about where I’d be leaving them and I was worried that at the end of the year people would walk away with me.

“The thought of it made me sick and I could never live with that. I just couldn’t do it, even though I wanted to. I just had to hang tough because I knew I’d regret it if I did walk away.

“When the pre-season started in the new year I had a chat to a few of the boys and they were pretty supportive.

“I took the family away in the first week of pre-season and I went to Queensland and tried to have a break, but it wasn’t really a break, I was still on the phone about footy.

“I’ve got two kids under three, so it really wasn’t a holiday where I could stop and gather my thoughts, refresh and soldier on. I missed two sessions and I was back into it but it was the hardest time in my life.”

But amid the sorrow and sadness is a man desperate to make a difference.

Reading about the hardship endured by Tim Russell, Brent Beer, Tracey Quinlan and Sheridan Edsall, who have all lost parents to cancer, Rory wanted to support the Let’s Kick Cancer cause.

Rory is eager for Newcomb, which has been deeply affected by cancer, to be involved and has urged the BFL to join Grovedale and Leopold in raising vital funds and awareness.

“Have you ever been in the Andrew Love Centre,” Rory asked.

“The staff in there are amazing. They just don’t stop. They walk in the door and they help families on the run.

“The waiting room is always full. There’s so many people suffering but to the staff in there . . . hats off to them. They work so hard.

“They treat young people, and they pass away, and they’ve got to back it up the next day and work again. They’re amazing.

“The people in the palliative care section of Grace McKellar are amazing, too. Kudos to them, they do a great job.”