Life is not a race, so cool your jets

Geelong Advertiser - - NEWS - A frash start with Ryan Reynolds

I’VE never really been a com­pet­i­tive per­son.

If you want some­thing, have it. I’m not go­ing to fight you to the death for it.

My wife Holly is the op­po­site.

When the go­ing gets tough, she gets go­ing.

I just say “Meh” and walk away.

That com­pet­i­tive­ness al­ways seems to flow into our re­la­tion­ship.

She has to be the first out the door and in the car, the first into bed, the first to fin­ish a Sat­ur­day morn­ing 10km run … you get the point.

Not even our hon­ey­moon could stop Holly’s com­pet­i­tive­ness … and she nearly paid the price!

Go­ing up a level in a Ber­lin train sta­tion, I de­cided to take the el­e­va­tor.

Holly, on the other hand, wanted to take the stairs.

She went fly­ing up them, de­ter­mined to beat me to the top.

She duly saluted, get­ting to the top in record time.

It was at that mo­ment she saw the train stand­ing on the plat­form. “This one, Ren?” she yelled. “Yup, that’s it,” I replied from about half­way up. Without a sec­ond thought Holly jumped on the train. She just had to get on first, didn’t she? What hap­pened next de­fied logic. Just as I got to the top of the stairs the train doors started to close. In­stead of hop­ping off (like a nor­mal per­son would), Holly stood there like a deer in head­lights. Within sec­onds the train started to de­part. I ran down the plat­form, fran­ti­cally yelling ex­ple­tives at her and the sit­u­a­tion.

I had ev­ery­thing. She had no phone, no wal­let, no train ticket and, worst of all, no idea about what our ho­tel was called.

It was at that mo­ment I re­alised my fi­nal words to my wife could pos­si­bly be: “You’re a bloody ********!”

As luck would have it Holly was smart enough to get out at the next sta­tion and wait.

I got there as quickly as I could, steam smok­ing from my ears as the train slowed down and I saw her stand­ing on the plat­form. Her face hadn’t changed from the mo­ment the train had left the plat­form at the sta­tion be­fore — she looked like a stunned mul­let.

But at least she was a safe stunned mul­let.

I hope she learnt her les­son … but I doubt it.

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