The lazy girl’s guide to killing it at school
LAZY GIRL’S GUIDE TO KILLING IT AT SCHOOL
Get it, girl!
You had the best intentions when you started the year with your fresh AF stationery, but it went downhill pretty fast. We know you wanted to start your assignment two weeks before it was due. But you didn’t. You started at 11.45pm the night before, yet again, and we, honestly, are not judging you coz we’ve all been there. But you still wanna do well and make your parents proud
(or at least not get in trouble!), so we’ve rounded up some cheats to guide you when you really need it.
Luckily, it is possible to hand in a piece of writing that won’t get you an F.
Essays with long word counts can be daunting. They’re even scarier when you’ve left them to the last minute. Luckily, it is possible to hand in a piece of writing that won’t get you an F. The first thing to do is switch your phone off so it doesn’t distract you. Next, plan your essay. Start by figuring out what the exact point is you want to get across. Then choose the topics you want to cover in each paragraph, and write your notes in dot point. Once you’ve decided the purpose of your essay, throw your introduction in at the top and your conclusion at the bottom. Remember key phrases like “in addition to”, “on the other hand”, and “contradicting the previous argument” – teachers love it, trust us. Reach that word count, throw your name on it and hand that bad boy in. BOOM. An essay has been born.
I didn’t know we had an exam tomorrow…
It happened again, dammit! When you were about to start revising for that history exam, you accidentally went to YouTube and fell into a hole of celebrity conspiracy videos. It happens to the best of us. First thing: DON’T PANIC. Take a deep breath and jot down all the main things you need to know. Your brain is more likely to absorb information when you’re feeling calm, so throw on a face mask, play some chill music, stick your notes on the bathroom wall (or bring them in with you) and have a relaxing bath. Continuously read over everything until you feel like you have memorised all your notes. No bath? Pop your notes in a plastic sleeve and stick them on the shower screen. Take a long shower and read those notes over and over until they are embedded in your brain.
Oops! I forgot to do my part of the group project
No-one wants to be the Zayn in a group project. But sometimes life can happen and next thing you know, it’s due tomorrow. Oops! Instead of sending a
“so sorrrrrrrry guys, been super busy” email, take control of the situation. Hit up everyone in the group chat (yep, even the bossy one) and ask what you can do. If they’re being salty, take it upon yourself to do something extra that will get your group bonus points. Explore different related topics, prepare a neat side-hustle presentation and become the unlikely hero of the group project.
I didn’t read the book
Instead of reading Othello over the weekend like your teacher asked, you were reading fanfic. Fair enough, we would do the same. Shakespeare, tbh, you could be steamier. But when you only have a few hours to learn a book from front to back, Wikipedia isn’t going to cut it. To get the TL;DR version of Shakespeare’s ye olde text, head to a website called nfs.sparknotes.com. They have translated every single one of his plays into everyday English and even have explanations of what his cryptic af phrases mean. If it’s just a regular book, head to shmoop.com. They’ve summarised and analysed all the themes for most books you’ll be studying at school. Read up, get educated and make yourself the #1 stan of your class text.
Wait, we had to keep a journal?
Keeping a journal or a logbook for subjects can be as tedious as cleaning your makeup brushes, but it has to be done. The point of your log – whether it’s dr ama or visual arts – is for you to keep yourself on track. Luckily, this is also one of those things where you can easily cut corners without anyone figuring it out. Write down a bunch of dates throughout the term. Then, assign a ‘process’ or ‘step’ of your project to each date. Write down how you feel, add a few pictures, sketch some ideas, throw in a few dot points until your book looks quite full. If you stay on task, this mundane task can be done in as little as two hours. You’re welcome.
You were daydreaming and the teacher asked you a question
Some call it “not paying attention”, but we prefer to call it “putting your imagination to the test”. The secret? MAKE SOMETHING UP. While you gather your thoughts and try to figure out what the heck she was talking about, make your best concentration face and throw in a: “Hmm, I mean, it depends which way you look at it.” Proceed to give your teacher an opinion on what you’re studying. It may not be what they’re looking for but, hey, it’s something. If you have mind-blanked, tell your teacher a fun fact. You’ll get points for participation and maybe some points for effort.