Taking out your emotional trash

How to create space for the new.

I’m a big advocate for reusing, recycling and composting but when it comes to our emotional waste – we need to get that sh*t straight to the landfill.

Our subconscious mind stores the memory of every experience we’ve ever had. It’s all in there so that, should similar circumstances present themselves, our brain can recall how we felt last time and coordinate an appropriate response in our body based on those feelings. This is how we decide whether we should enter growth/open mode, or protection/closed mode (our fight or flight reflex). Essentially, we make decisions about the future, based on what we experienced in the past.

This is all very well most of the time. If you burned your hand on a hot element, your pain would register in your subconscious and you would automatically know in future, not to put your hand there again. It protects you – survival is its number one aim.

What, though, if the threat isn’t real? What if it has been created by our mind? How much life does our subconscious mind prevent us from living because of past pain that we don’t want to feel again?

How much potential joy are we missing out on because we’re scared?

The sort of things I hear when there is lingering emotional trash:

“Oh no, I couldn’t go through that again” “Don’t you know what happened to me last time?”

“Don’t go there”

“I have to avoid those situations (or people)”

“I’m not ready to let that go”

It’s time to take out this emotional trash so you’re free to invite new experiences and change the narrative – even when the scenario unfolding is similar to something that didn’t turn out so great last time.

How?

Shift the focus from what you don’t want to what you do want. Every thought is building a neural pathway which makes it easier and easier to think that thought again. So make a conscious effort to build better pathways one thought at a time. You’ll need discipline for this.

Reframe the past result. That person who broke your heart? That business that failed? Perhaps it had to happen to teach you something. Ask yourself, what have I learned? Now, instead of being a victim, you’re an empowered human who learned a new skill that can help you get a better result next time.

Trust yourself. You’re stronger now – even if the same outcome happened again (the worst-case scenario), you’re better equipped. Take the risk, it’s just as likely to work out to be better than you imagine.

Clear space. By letting go of some of our emotional baggage, we free up energy that can be redirected towards something else. No energy? No new experiences. kaylagreenville.com