ARE YOU THREATENING HIS MANHOOD?
What’s he thinking when... girls do typical ‘guy’ stuff
This is a slightly tricky one for a man to talk about. While guys tend to look favourably on girls doing typical ‘guy stuff’ to a certain extent, there is a point when it becomes a bit too much and it can make us feel a bit emasculated and quite inadequate. Let me elaborate.
FIXING THINGS - A MAN’S JOB
My sister-in-law has a complete set of spanners that are a whole lot better than mine. They’re in one of those really cool tool-chests with spring-loaded drawers and wheels to make it easy to roll around the garage, looking for things to fix. I was impressed when I first saw them, no question. They come from a
time before she was married when she was a hip young thing taking care of business and getting the job done on her own. This becomes endearing, because you know she is capable of fixing things…but she doesn’t need to anymore because she has a bloke around the place to do it instead. We’re good at fixing things. It is in our DNA. Replace a lightbulb? Man’s job! We are slightly taller on average, after all. Fix a washer? Man’s job! We are physically stronger and remember how things go back together once we take them apart (ahem). Clean out the gutters? Sure, we are good at climbing and like getting our hands dirty.
There comes a point where we feel useless if girls are doing too many ‘guy-things’ around the house. It often means that we have left that job for too long and you have become sick of it not being done. Your insistence on doing it yourself is a sign that you are displeased; so the whole thing develops a negative vibe about it.
MEN AND SPORT
Let’s move on and consider sport. I realise that girls like sport as well but they probably don’t obsess about it like men do. I’m guessing that the ratio of males playing Fantasy NRL is rather much higher than the number of females playing it. However, sport is a different territory to doing male household tasks. If you are as much into sport as we are, it opens up a brave new world of romantic possibilities for us. Long Sunday afternoons sitting very, very still, watching grown men run around a paddock hitting each other! Sharing a pie and warm beer while sitting on muddy grass on The Hill during a rainy evening at the footy! Obsessing over the intricate details of the league ladder together, working out how many goals for-and-against we need to avoid being relegated at season’s end!
If you start comparing us to 20-year old athletes who earn enormous amounts of cash, that is patently unfair. Pointing out that we used to play the same sport and wondering why we never became a superstar will only serve to remind us of our inadequacies.
A certain subtle level of manly behaviour by girls, is not a bad thing. It can bring us together, give us something to bond over. If it gives us a chance to demonstrate our encyclopaedic knowledge of ‘guy stuff’, then we do actually appreciate your interest.
However, if it threatens our manhood, then it will instantly stop being endearing and become a challenge. We take enormous pride in fixing things around the house, demonstrating our sporting prowess and pretending to be the man that you feel we should be. It is innate, it is part of our complex psychological makeup to appear strong, calm, in control and able to solve any domestic puzzle with brute force, skill and wisdom. We don’t like to be reminded that you can live without us, no matter how true it might be! So take an interest, by all means. Assist when we look like we would appreciate some help. Indulge our strange love affair with all feats of sporting prowess.