[ TW ]IN CONVERSATION
near me, I wait for her to ask, “Are you twins?” But she doesn’t. Instead, she passes me a pen and asks us for our autographs. The woman in the restaurant thinks we’re famous.
After a week of trying to make it as a twinfluencer, I feel like I’ve finally succeeded. There have been wins along the way. I reached out to my favourite boutique, Mixed Lollies, about borrowing a few looks in exchange for some social love and they happily obliged. A local earring designer (@rainowdanila) enquired about a collaboration, but I didn’t think I could force my sister to get her ears pierced for a #sponcon post. And finally, I got the message I’d been waiting for, “Hey babe – my friend found you on Insta and said you’d look stunning in [cheap Instagramonly fashion brand].” Of course, it was a spam message, but let’s not get caught up in details here.
The biggest challenge of the week was obvious: being an influencer and creating quality content every single day is hard work. Maybe that’s why twins are so good at it – because they can share the load. There’s the concept ideation, the shooting, the editing and the witty caption writing. Taking a decent photo with your twin is especially hard when your blinking rhythm is out of sync.
The second-biggest challenge took me by surprise. After 10 years apart and an entire adult life of being an individual, it was almost uncomfortable being compared to my sister so much. When we played spot the difference as kids it was a game, but at 29 it feels different. My sister has a loving partner, a worthy career and recently bought a home (not to mention the PhD). Meanwhile, I’m newly single, watch a lot of Love Island and currently live out of a suitcase. I know comparison is the thief of joy, but when you’re an identical twin it’s inevitable.
“At some point, twins want to be known as individuals and to feel like they’re worthy on their own, rather than as a pair,” says Dr Joan Friedman, a renowned twin expert and psychologist. “In a healthy twin relationship, being a twin should be part of their life but not their whole life. For that to happen, twins need to find out who they are as people.”
As people, Sophie and I might be in very different places in our lives, but we still have one thing in common: neither of us are cut out to be twinfluencers. Sure, my Instagram engagement hit a record high this week with dozens of comments like “Obsessed with this twin content of late,” and I did gain 15 new
What’s the best thing about being a twin?
Having someone you don’t have to explain things to.
How did people tell us apart when we were little?
I have a birthmark on my left arm, but Nan could tell us apart in the middle of the night by our coughs. What’s the funniest mistaken identity moment you’ve had?
When someone you’d been on a date with crossed the road to hug me hello and I thought he was just a very friendly bloke, until he said, “Oh God, you’re not Sophie, are you?”
I always get mistaken for you at the bottleshop.
Naturally, I’m a regular. What’s the spookiest twin moment we’ve had?
When I was living in Russia, you instinctively knew that I was sick when I had been taken to hospital with a kidney infection.
How do you think being a twin has shaped you as a person?
SP: I have severe separation anxiety. Thanks for that.
Being a twin has given me this unshakable sense that I’m special.
Yep, special is one word for it. followers, but I didn’t manage to nail a single #sponcon deal – not even for teeth-whitening toothpaste or fake tan. It’s at this point that I must make a confession: the woman in the restaurant who asked for our autographs was a friend.
The upside of this ordeal is that I did get to spend some quality time with my sister, who experienced her first mani-pedi and now has an endless well of material for jokes about how vapid my life can be. We’ve always been close (except for our first year at university together when we fought every day, mostly about her using my makeup and wearing my clothes), but now that we’re living together as adults, our bond feels even stronger. Regardless of where we are in the world, Sophie is my home. She’s my safety blanket and my best friend. That’s the real joy of being a twin – knowing we’ll never be alone. As well as being able to share makeup and clothes, of course.
After we finished picking the prickles out of our feet from our barefoot #outbacktwins photoshoot, Sophie stopped glaring at me and said something earnest: “You know, you’re really good at your job, Al. I’m proud of you.”
I may not have made it as a twinfluencer, but I made my sister proud. That’s all that really matters. (Side note: if you would like to collaborate with me on any gifting opportunities, I’m at @alleypascoe.)