‘Jane Doe’ finds

Vocal campaigner refuses to be defined by abuse as a teenager

GRACE Tame had just turned 15 years old when her 58-year-old teacher, Nicolaas Bester, began grooming her, later committing between 20 and 30 penetrative sexual assaults against the schoolgirl.

A talented student and dual-scholarship holder at the elite St Michael’s Collegiate girls’ school in Hobart, Grace had recently been hospitalised with anorexia, and was suffering from depression and low self-esteem.

In the playground she had been bullied, and at home normal routine was disrupted by the impending arrival of a new baby brother.

Now aged 24, Grace remembers the exact moment that the grooming began.

Following a morning medical appointment in April 2010, she had arrived at school late. Her Year 10 classmates were on a school excursion and, as Grace wandered the playground alone, Nicolaas Bester — the head of maths and science — spotted her.

“We talked for a long time and after that day he became a confidant,” Grace said. “He would give me advice about my anorexia and let me stay in his office whenever I wanted.”

Gradually, as Grace began to place more trust in him, he began to sexualise the relationship.

He showed her movies featuring relationships with large age gaps, including The Graduate, and in both April and June 2010 he advised Grace to draw a nude sketch of herself as “therapy” for her low self-esteem. Reluctantly, Grace complied.

“Everything just snowballed from there. He also knew I’d been sexually

Grace Tame’s story reveals the inner toughness which has sustained her through the past nine years. There is no good reason why she has had to wait so long to tell her story

abused as a child by an older child in a wardrobe closet. I told him because I trusted him. Instead he took that knowledge and used it against me in the most sick and sinister, cruel way.”

Bester recreated a scene reminiscent of the initial abuse, and what followed after that was months of escalating sexual abuse — culminating in 20 to 30 instances of unlawful intercourse. The abuse often occurred on school grounds and at one point in the principal’s own chair.

“I hated it,” Grace said. “It was repulsive. I always closed my eyes. I didn’t want it to be real. I didn’t want to be doing and saying the things I was either, but I felt trapped. At the back of my mind were stories he’d told me about being in the army and killing people and feeling no regret.”

Bester was a South African soldier in the Angolan civil war

“He would also constantly say ‘you don’t want me to lose my job do you?’.”

Grace began self-harming and drinking. To maintain the secrecy, Bester set up fake Facebook accounts — including one as a woman — and instructed Grace to tell anyone who saw them together that he was her father. Meanwhile, at home, Grace’s family members were beside themselves with worry as they watched self-harming scars appear.

“We were trying desperately to work it out and help her, but we had no idea that abuse was happening during school hours when we assumed she was safe,” says Penny Plaschke, Grace’s mother.

Documents obtained under Right to Information show throughout the abuse numerous teachers at the school held concerns — including one teacher who had seen Grace and Bester at the school at the weekend in the science area, and another who raised her concerns after witnessing Bester at Grace’s weekend workplace.

Tragically, in April 2010, before any sexual contact had ever occurred, Grace’s own parents had organised an urgent meeting with the school to discuss the escalating attention Bester was bestowing on their daughter.

The documents show that at that meeting Grace’s parents alerted the former principal, Robyn Kronenberg, that Bester had given Grace a key to his office and was spending hours alone with their daughter unsupervised.

After that meeting the principal warned Bester that “his conduct was not professional and that he should not see Grace at all.”

At first, Bester kept his distance as per the principal’s directive. But by June he had re-initiated contact and the sexual abuse then continued until December. In the end, it was Grace herself who finally sounded the alarm, and in April 2011 police became involved. Grace’s father, Michael Tame, then confronted Bester, who responded by saying “she wanted it”.

An arrest followed, at which time police found 28 pieces of child pornography on Bester’s computer.

Bester was sentenced to two years and 10 months jail for the crimes against Grace and the child pornography offence. However, in February 2015, following an early release, he reoffended by making child exploitation material. He was sentenced to a further four months’ jail.

Grace says she refuses to be defined by these crimes. After initially dropping out of school, she returned to complete Year 12 at a different school in Hobart, where she achieved an ATAR of 98.3. She has since completed two associate degrees in theatre arts and liberal arts from Santa Barbara City College.

She is now a distinguished artist, with high-profile clients including comedian John Cleese, and says she intends to use her new-found voice to campaign for the rights of other sexual abuse survivors.

“Perpetrators thrive on victims’ silence and community misconceptions of these crimes,” Grace said.

“We need to shatter that stigma and silence.” Grace’s full story will appear on ABC 7.30 Report tonight. If you or someone you know has been impacted by sexual assault support is available by calling 1800 RESPECT on 1800 737 732. Know more? Contact ninafunnell@gmail.com