STRAIGHT TALK

We’re all different. That’s a fact, and it’s not a bad thing. My musical taste is rock, country rock, blues, and R&B, but some people listen to rap and hip-hop. To me, cars are about style, size, and speed, but I accept that for others fuel economy is all that matters. While I reckon there’s nothing funnier than dropping a sneaky fart into a lift full of people just before I get off at the third floor, I get it that not everyone would see the funny side of that. We’re all different, and there’s nothing wrong with having different views and tastes and approaches to things.

Times change, too. Trends shift, and fashion moves from here to there. So much of what we do and what we accept is vastly different to how it was 20 or 30 years ago. I don’t want to drink big bottles of Lion Brown at 10am at a car event any more, and after 20 years of shameful espresso snobbery I don’t want to stop at tea rooms or drink instant coffee. But what shouldn’t ever change with the passage of time, or shouldn’t be acceptable because of the differences in our values, is a belief that it’s no longer necessary to apply common courtesy and respect towards your fellow man, and respect towards your fellow man’s property. I’d heard the terms ‘Generation Y’ and ‘Millennial’ before, but I didn’t really know what they meant. Commander Phil — a mate who works in the NZ Defence Force and has shoes so highly polished they could be entered in the Pebble Beach concours d’elegance — explained to me recently that ‘Baby Boomers’ are those born between 1946 and 1964, so I just squeeze into that group; ‘Generation X’ are those born between 1965 and 1981 — that’s those of us aged from 40 to 56; and then there’s the ‘Generation Y’, who were born between 1982 and 1995 — those of us who are 26 to 39. Commander Phil has a guideline on the various attributes of all of these groups — used by the Defence Force to help the leaders understand how to approach different age groups — including their characteristics, communication styles, problems, and flaws.

As an example, Commander Phil’s guideline says that the characteristics of a Baby Boomer are: hard-working, loyal, confident, and competitive. That pretty much sums up most of my samegeneration mates. A Generation X is: antiauthority, self-reliant, and family focused. A Generation Y is: needy and entitled. Interesting! Looking at the heading of “Why They Are The Way They Are”, it describes Baby Boomers as “reared to pursue the American dream” — obviously an American guideline — whereas Generation X is “reared to be self-sufficient”, and Generation Y is “always rewarded for participation”. While the other attribute of Baby Boomers is generally solid, and Generation X is a little more self-focused, Generation Y “expects immediate feedback”, asks of everything “what’s in it for me”, and thinks “I’m not taken seriously”.

So, if you believe Commander Phil’s guideline — and I’m not saying you should or you shouldn’t — you could take the view that some of our younger populace might be a little on the self-absorbed side.

Where am I going with all of this? If I didn’t believe those generational generalisations before last year’s Big Boys Toys show in Auckland,

I found myself giving them a bit more credit afterwards. LVVTA had a trade site there, and I had my 1964 Cadillac Sedan de Ville on display to showcase the new retro-fit lap and diagonal seat belt system that we’ve been designing for old pillarless and convertible vehicles. It’s a neat system that enables the front-seat occupants to have a modern inertia-reel lap and diagonal lap seat belt without the obtrusive look you get from a seatbelt anchorage in the roof — causing the belt to hang down where the B-pillar would be. The Caddy is a nice old car, and I left the doors open throughout the weekend and welcomed interested people to sit in the car and put the seat belt on so they could see that it looks OK and is comfortable. Of course everyone would be respectful …

What I hadn’t realised — silly me — was that I’d also provided a free amusement park ride for every child owned by young parents who came to the show. The older mums and dads almost without fail asked us if it was OK for the kids to stand by the car or sit in the car to get their photo taken — of course it was — and most times you’d hear the parent quietly cautioning the child not to touch things, and to sit still. Afterwards there would usually be a “Thank you” from the parent or the kid, or both.

The younger parents, conversely, provided a contrast to that respectful behaviour so glaring that it was like an electric shock. The kids parented by people in their 20s and 30s would run to the car, jump in, touch everything, yank on the gear lever, swing on the steering wheel, walk on the seats, and then leap out and run off at full speed in pursuit of their next victim. Most times the parents would say nothing and do nothing, other than providing reinforcement, by their silence, to their little shits that their behaviour was perfectly acceptable. At one point during the weekend there was a smiling mother bursting with pride, hoping that everyone was watching as her two grubby little snot-machines jumped up and down on the Cadillac’s red leather seats like it was a f***ing trampoline. As I walked towards her — seething inside and wondering how the hell I was going to communicate a pleasant request for the scone-grabbers to quit ruining my car’s interior that had, previous to this moment, managed to survive over half a century of normal use — the little shit started bouncing from the front seat over to the rear seat and then back again over to the front seat.

This unimaginable ignorance went on all weekend, to the extent that we had to ‘stand guard’ in order to prevent it from continuing. It was plain to see that, in 20 years’ time, those entitled and inconsiderate little shits will be entitled and inconsiderate adults who’ll encourage their own little shits to behave in the same entitled and inconsiderate way that they were allowed to. That weekend was a real eye-opener.

If you’re a Generation Y and you’re all heated up and calling me a silly old prick who doesn’t know anything, I’m not saying for a minute that everyone in their 20s and 30s is like that. I know lots of great young people who are the complete opposite of the hordes of ignorant twats at Big Boys Toys. What I am saying is that every parent who behaved in that selfish, thoughtless, and moronic way was in their 20s and 30s; every older parent or grandparent was entirely courteous and respectful. The pattern was so clear that it couldn’t be missed or mistaken. Something has happened to people somewhere along the way, which has caused them to think that no one on this planet matters except for them. If there’s any factual basis to Commander Phil’s guideline, and these are the behavioural traits that are going to govern the future of our world, then the planet is in way deeper shit than just having too much carbon monoxide and too few black-footed ferrets.

“… ENTITLED AND INCONSIDERATE LITTLE SHITS …”