Just Desserts

I used to get teased quite a lot at school because I bore a slight resemblance to a bowl of custard. Luckily I had quite a thick skin. OLAF FALAFEL, COMEDIAN

OPERATOR: Hello, Police.

ME: I need to speak to an officer please. I’ve been accused of chucking something at someone, but it was only a bit of my dessert!

OPERATOR: Just pudding you threw.

ME: Thank you. PAUL EGGLESTON, VIA TWITTER