YOUR RIGHT HAND

Best men and maids of honour do more than plan parties

Choosing a best man and a maid of honour can be tough, especially if you have a best friend and a sibling competing for the position.

At the end of the day, the person you choose to be your right hand, will do more than just plan your bachelorettes and bucks’ parties.

They will stand as your first witness and they will speak for you at the reception.

This is a place of high honour, presented to the person who means the most to you (apart from your intended, of course) and knows you particularly well.

So, what do you do if you’re torn between choosing your sibling and choosing your best mate, both of whom have been there for you through thick and thin?

The hard truth is that this depends entirely on the unique situation you find yourself in.

Ask yourself whether you are drawn to either of the candidates because of a sense of tradition or guilt — and be honest with yourself.

Just because one of the two is the expected choice, does not mean you have to choose them.

If you’re afraid of how they might take your decision, talk to them about why you would like to choose the other person.

Chances are, they will understand more than you might think, will give you their blessing and won’t take it personally — we’re talking about your family and your best friend, after all.

If choosing is something you cannot bring yourself to do, nothing is stopping you from having two best men or maids of honour.

It’s your wedding day, so you make the rules.