Bum note in race to the bottom
The latest fashion trend towards larger — and highly visible — women’s derrières may look acceptable on the beach bikini beat but there’s a painful price to pay in terms of tolerance
PLEASE, can we put away the bottoms?
Yes, I’m temporarily shelving my three university degrees and near 20 years in journalism to talk about bums. Bare with me (I’m so sorry).
If you’ve been on an Australian beach recently you will know that bikini briefs are receding faster than polar ice caps.
Everywhere you look, the wrong type of cheeks are smiling back. It’s so prolific a swimwear trend, I clench at the thought of all the weeping melanomas being painfully cut from women’s buttocks in a few years.
The most recent season of Bachelor in Paradise triggered so many viewer objections over the bikini bottoms — or lack thereof — that Network 10 went as far as to hover a black censorship bar over one woman’s bikini.
“Back in my day, bikini bottoms legit covered your bottom. Simpler times,” one woman sighed online.
These days, though, botON THOUSANDS OF TOURISTS FLOCKING TO CLIMB ULURU BEFORE IT CLOSES
Traipsing all over the rock and leaving heaps of rubbish behind, not respecting it. Give me a break, I never felt more Australian and proud of our shared country than when I sat atop the rock viewing the surrounding land. It was a very spiritual experience for me as I’m sure it is for many others. Maggie Bibby
Why do people think it is their right to climb Uluru? it is selfish and disrespectful. We walked around the base and also went on toms are everywhere.
Not to be outdone, Kim Kardashian, Emily Ratajkowski, Rihana, JLo and countless hordes of other Instagram influencers are taking things up a notch by championing the belfie (that’s a bum selfie).
There is the even more absurd ‘shelfie belfie’ craze — a belfie taken on a ledge or shelf a cultural tour. The tour leader told us stories of the rock and also the reasons why climbing it causes such issues. We look forward to visiting again and not see it being desecrated. Kevin Fritsch
I’m Australian, I should be able to climb the rock whenever I’m there. Just because a minority says so, we should not have to listen to them. Terry Bettens
I have climbed it once and I will climb it again, don’t tell me what is and is not on my bucket list. Richard Davies Respect is a two-way street. Choosing not to climb is (usually a pool or garden wall) to help maximise the spread of the derrière.
Kardashian (she of the “break the internet” bum) has kept up the trend by last month releasing her own line of body makeup. Because, obviously, your bum needs an even complexion when it’s getting so much airtime.
Even tennis icon Serena Williams, 37, and her naked bum share this month’s cover of US style-bible Harper’s Bazaar.
But I’m ready to see the back of this ridiculous obsession.
As a mother of twins in nappies, I see bums frequently. So much so that whenever I venture on to social media and am faced with a stream of bums my immediate reflex is to reach for some wet wipes, give them a smear of Sudocrem and wrestle a nappy on them. I can’t help it.
I hail from the era of Kate Moss, when women wanted to be boyish and snake-hipped.
Big bottoms may also be incomprehensible to the generations of women who prayed at the altars of Atkins and aerobics to whittle down their frames to whippet thin.
Yet these days, no bum is too big.
Not since the Victorian era, when women shoved bustles up their skirts, have we been so infatuated with engorging women’s rears.
Even Pippa Middleton has been butt shamed.
The sister of Kate, who unleashed global conniptions with her royal bridesmaid backside, was recently criticised by a British paper for having a flat behind or, as it was so rudely described, a “mum bum”.
How is it that, in the midst of an obesity epidemic, we are lusting over large rumps?
The dissenters will moan in respectful as is providing a safe climbing route and experience for those who choose to climb it in a respectful manner. It should not be a case that your demand for respect in not climbing denies respect for a decision to climb. Just don’t be a d**k if you do climb. Michael Lane Rather visit and climb Mt Augustus in WA. Wayne Driver The rock belongs to all Australians. Brett Matthews ON CHARLES DARWIN UNIVERSITY’S $21 MILLION BLACK HOLE
No problems here. The NT Government will give them a $21 million grant. After all, boundless possible! Lou Cowan
They’ve stripped the TAFE side of their money for years to prop up the professional courses. Maybe each course needs to be audited. Tania Alps Nicholls
Next minute, the Territory Government bails out and a couple of Honorary Doctorates to MLA’s. Craig Ramsay
On top of cuts, completion rate at CDU is also lowest among all Australian institutions. The fee for an international students is now $34k a year. These factors will make conditions worsen in couple of years. Hercules Malik
Is there anything in the Northern Territory that isn’t in pain? Government? Small business? Universities? Mining? Pat Connell
Too much interest in foreign students and politics to worry about Aussie kids, typical of all education in Australia these days. James Neill
How can they go ahead with a $500 million new city campus in the mall, yet still have a $21 million deficient? Steven Downie
Why do they expect student numbers to increase when our general population is decreasing? Yvonne Patterson