Licensed yobbo
Matt makes a meal of it
A FEED at the pub is relative, according to Health Minister this week when she casually sledged Sky News reporter when he asked what qualified as a “meal” when getting a drink under Stage 2 of coronavirus restrictions. Ms Fyles, without missing a beat said, “Well I think that we’d have a different interpretations of a meal Matt”. But the exchange didn’t end there. Cunningham, in a follow-up question, said: “thanks for fatshaming me”. Ms Fyles later clarified the food with a drink restriction would lift on June 5 so he would not “have to have the bowl of chips, Matt, with your beer.”
Schooners of giggles
DARWIN publican had
presenter in stitches during a live cross on Friday. The Deck Bar owner revealed he was an offering a special deal on buckets of corona to celebrate NT pubs finally reopening. “We’re pretty excited to get back to it … there’ll be about 100,000 schooners that we’re going to be smashing,” Hanna said. The comment seemed to take Stefanovic off guard and he laughed until his face was red.
Croc of lame excuses
DARWIN Local Court Judge John Neill was less than impressed with one young man’s excuse for not getting his driver’s licence this week when he cited “personal reasons”.”Personal reasons? Crocodiles had chewed your legs off?” his honour inquired. ”Next thing you know you’ll be dead of old age and you’ll never have gotten your licence.” Mr Neill urged the 20-year-old to “stop mucking around” and get it done.
GDS haters in a spin
WE’VE all heard of Trump Derangement Syndrome. But Bushie can now confirm Gunner Derangement Syndrome is a real thing in the Territory. The Gunner haters have been out in force and are struggling to come to terms with the fact that his popularity has increased in recent times. The widespread belief that his government is now a better chance of getting re-elected in August has sent the GDS haters into a tailspin. It’s hilarious to watch.
Kink in the police line
QUEENSLAND Police perhaps should have
WORST PERFORMANCE OF THE WEEK:
gone to Specsavers before advising media they had launched an “death investigation” after finding a body on the side of the highway in the state’s north. Police media were forced to send out an alert to media several hours later advising journalists that the investigation had concluded as the “body” they found was in fact a “lifelike replica doll”.
Virus sceptic on show
THE NT Government was revving up Territorians and businesses all week ahead of pubs, restaurants and gyms reopening but one
IT was suggested to Bushie this week, by a peasant Southerner, that Territorians were perhaps taking their love of being a yobbo a bit too far. But one local has clearly decided to embrace the stereotype, paying extra for the licence plate ‘BOGAN’. Good onya mate!
business owner this week might not have been the best option to front the media alongside Chief Minister
While nothing controversial was said at his Monday press conference, Evolve Fitness founder online presence is littered with scepticism about the coronavirus, having shared many posts and articles suggesting the virus has been created by the Government to help control the global population, and suggestions a cure exists and has existed since November.