that's life (Australia)
Dear that’s life!
Say something. You say you’ve been friends for years, and it’s your home too. If you don’t say anything, you will move out and lose two good friends.
I don’t blame you for hating the arguing. Stay impartial. It’s their relationship not yours so you don’t need to pass any comment or opinion. Physically distancing yourself from things you dislike is good self care. It sounds like you’re doing the right thing.
Say you’re worried
Talk to them separately and ask if everything is okay as you’ve heard them arguing a lot and are worried because you love them, and ask if there’s anything you can do to help.
Find some leaflets
Can you get hold of some marriage counselling pamphlets and pop them in the letterbox?
Have you got any other friends you could possibly ask to rent with to keep costs down? Or explore the possibility of share accommodation? Or even ask if friends of friends are looking for boarders to help cover the costs? Sounds like anywhere would be an improvement on your current situation.
Not a good
If an opportunity comes to move elsewhere, take it knowing that you don’t enjoy living in that environment.
Don’t get involved
Stay completely out of it at all costs. If you say anything, you’ll have just got yourself involved. You will then become an issue or they’ll expect you to take sides. And if they stay together, they’ll probably never talk to you again. They might break up but it’s best not to chance it.
Buy a good pair of headphones, preferably ones that are noise cancelling.
Talk it out
If they’re friends you’ve known for years, tell them straight that it needs to stop. Whatever the issue is, they need to get it talked out rather than shouting when you’re in the house trying to relax or get some sleep.
I’ve recently moved into the spare room in a house with a couple who have both been good friends of mine for years. The trouble is they argue all the time and I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. I avoid them by staying in my room. I don’t want to take sides and I don’t want to lose two good friends but I hate the way they speak to each other and am very tempted to say something. Also, I can’t afford to move anywhere else right now.
What do I do? You’re paying rent so don’t put up with it.
Make light of it
Maybe they don’t even realise. Can you find a way to bring it up in a light-hearted way so as not to offend them, but at the same time make them aware that you have noticed the arguing?
Keep your head down
Keep out of the way. I’ve been in this situation and got kicked out and they never spoke to me again. Walking on eggshells
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