2014: We laughed, loved, cried and despaired
WHAT DID WE GET UP TO in 2014? Well, we got a boy-crush on #AlexfromTarget, did the icebucket challenge, and mourned the death of actor Robin Williams. We didn’t like it when U2’s new album just appeared free on our iTunes accounts, laughed at Gwyneth Paltrow and her “conscious uncoupling” and made fun of chef Pete Evans and his activated almonds.
Bill Cosby almost surprised everyone when he was accused of sexual assault by dozens of women, and Ian Thorpe surprised no one when he declared he was gay.
We also worried about Ebola, mourned the loss of two Malaysian Airlines flights, and watched with alarm at the rise of the Islamic State.
We also admired the determination and grace of Rosie Batty in the aftermath of the death of her son Luke. But we cheered ourselves up by talking about Karl Stefanovic and his smelly blue suit, Samantha Armytage and her love life and the fact Russell Crowe has finally made an Aussie movie people want to see.
Here are some more stand-out moments of 2014. Best Political Performer: 2014 was the year Foreign Minister Julie Bishop became popular just as Prime Minister Tony Abbott’s popularity dived. In other words, The Stare fought The Budgie Smuggler, and The Stare won. Biggest Idiot: Mr Abbott wasn’t helped by faux pas from his colleagues, such as Defence Minister David Johnston who said he wouldn’t trust SA’s Australian Submarine Corporation to “build a canoe”. No one had ever heard of him, but that didn’t stop us from judging him to be Abbott’s poorest performer by far. Most out of Touch: Treasurer Joe Hockey also bombed after suggesting poor people won’t be affected by changes to the fuel excise because they “either don’t have cars or actually don’t drive very far in many cases”. Watch him try to crawl his way back into favour in 2015. Most colourful: Former PUP Senator Jacqui Lambie also hit the headlines in 2014, declaring she wanted a rich guy with a “package”. She’s still single, but at least she’s no longer hanging around Clive Palmer, which means she gets to throw out all her yellow scarves. Most famous body part: Bottoms reigned supreme in 2014. Kim Kardashian tried to break the internet by balancing a champagne glass on her bare bottom. Meghan Trainor sang about her healthy-sized derriere in while Nicki Minaj could be found clapping with her bum cheeks in Best new band: Pop band 5 Seconds of Summer (pictured) went global at the same time most of us said, “Who the hell is 5 Seconds of Summer? And why only five seconds, not three months?” (Teens reading this will be clutching their heads and muttering OMG, FFS and LOL.) Best song: Taking a more dignified approach was Aussie pop sensation Sia. We loved her hit although we thought the film clip of the pre-pubescent girl in the nude leotard dancing in a derelict boarding house room was a bit suss. Best TV shows: During 2014, made us laugh, along with We loved got a bit tired of and totally ignored Although we didn’t watch we were all united in our disdain for Blake Garvey’s love rat ways. Best game: Also this year, AFL finally returned to the Adelaide Oval, which was amazing – especially when Port creamed Richmond in an elimination final in front of more than 50,000 people. Best Twitter spat: Many people celebrated when Adam Goodes was made Aussie of the year, and thought our favourite bogan bad-boy Shane Warne was rude when he questioned it on Twitter. However, we do want footballers to spend less time worrying about political causes and get back to playing roolly good footy. Saddest death: The death of cricketer Phillip Hughes had us all grieving genuinely for someone most of us had never heard of and didn’t know personally. It was so sudden and random, and the fact that many of us watched it happen made it all the more tragic. Best winner: In sport, we cheered on the very fit Nick Kyrgios when he beat Rafael Nadal in a heart-stopping Wimbledon showdown. We loved the idea of the number 144 in the world beating the number one, especially because his mum didn’t think he’d do it.
So there you have it: 2014 in review. Merry Christmas and a safe and happy new year to you and your families. Keep in touch in 2015. Blog with Susie at susieobrien.com.au and follow her on Twitter @susieob