Lend an ear, it could save a life
IT’S either feast or famine, writing a weekly column. There’s so much I could write about; NASA has found that water once flowed on Mars, Malcolm Turnbull has a new Cabinet, and ice and domestic violence are under the national spotlight.
Water on Mars was something I used to dream about as a youngster, my mind then full of science fiction and fantasy from the novels I read and the films I saw.
However, I’m going to revisit a sensitive subject. Last week I received a letter. Not an email, a real letter, handwritten in flowing and intelligent script, in an envelope with a stamp from the Dandenong Ranges in Victoria.
The letter was from a lady called Margaret, with no reply address, and no way of contacting her.
She’d read a piece I wrote back in July, about suicide. I quote from Margaret’s letter. “As a mother who has lost two loved and loving sons to suicide, five months apart, I read your well-presented article with serious interest.
“There are so many reasons why dear ones end their lives in this way … I know of an eightyear-old boy who died by suicide, because he couldn’t choose which choose which parent to live with because they were separating.”
Margaret goes on to write about her concerns about euthanasia, and her fears that youth suicide will some day in the future be ac- cepted by society as “their choice”.
She goes on: “Every human life does matter. The human debris that is left behind after a loved one’s suicide is forever.
“We all should be encouraged to care a bit more about each other, and listen, even if it’s ‘inconvenient’, it could be that a ‘listening moment’ made a difference between a person living or dying.” I know exactly what Margaret means. A former colleague at Channel Nine in Brisbane took his own life in 1999, and I was too busy to heed the warning signs.
I was invited to a barbecue with him and his wife only a week before, and decided I’d rather have an afternoon to myself instead. Obviously I’ve regretted it ever since. Maybe if I’d gone, it would have made the difference between life or death.
According to the latest figures from the Australian Bureau of Statistics, published in March this year:
“In 2013, 1885 males and 637 females died by suicide, a total of 2522 deaths, which equates to an average of 6.9 deaths by suicide each day.”
The statistics go on and on, far too many to write about here.
Coincidentally, as the editor of The Cairns Post’s education paper, Post-Ed, we’ve plans in the pipeline for a weekly column, written by healthcare professionals, where pupils can write in anonymously if they’ve a problem they can’t deal with at home or at school.
It’s a small start, I know, but it’s better than nothing.
Finally, Margaret asked me to mention an organisation called The Compassionate Friends which provides friendship and support to bereaved parents and their families following the death of a child at any age and from any cause. Their website is easy to find. So this column is my reply to your letter, Margaret, as it’s the only way I can think of to communicate with you, as you didn’t leave your address. I hope it meets with your approval. For anyone who needs help, call Lifeline on 13 11 14, Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800, or beyondblue on 1300 224 636.
www.christopherellis.net