Zodiac forecasts

Seasons Greetings! The December Solstice is over, the Capricorn ingress has occurred and, to celebrate, many are dedicating the ancient festival of Yule (or Saturnalia) to the remembrance of a maverick Middle Eastern preacher called Yeshua. We don’t actually know when he was born but whenever it was, we are told, the Romans disliked his horoscope so much, they tried to hunt him down and kill him. Thirty-three years later, they got their wish. After a few more centuries, they translated his name into Latin, adapted his teachings and invented Christmas. Oh… and there’s a Full Moon tomorrow.

aries

Mar 20 – Apr 19

‘He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you’re awake, he knows when you’ve been bad or good, so…’ John Coots, composer of this song, was a Taurean. Why was he so sure that Santa knew who had been bad or good?’ Is Santa omniscient? If so, why is he not also omnipresent and omnipotent as most quasi-deities are assumed to be. Why do we only ever hear from him in December? Regardless of what he knows, you know you’ve been good. You deserve the reward that’s coming your way this Christmas. Make this a Christmas to remember. You deserve something special. Call 1900 959 005.

gemini

May 21 – Jun 20

Next year in May, a rare transit of Mercury will reveal (to those wearing eclipse glasses) your ruling planet as a tiny black dot against the Sun. It is a historic, symbolic, event that portends discovery leading to a great potential gain to every Gemini. Any similar sighting today, though, will have to be interpreted as Father Christmas in the distance making his way through the sky. Is there really a more concrete reason than that to expect that this festive season will treat you with true generosity? Actually, there is. There’s a forecast filled with festive fun waiting for you. Give me a call: 1900 959 005.

leo

Jul 22 – Aug 22

Just what is it that Santa Claus can’t do - apart, perhaps, from present us all with one definitive version of himself that can say, ‘Forget those other imposters, I’m the real one?’ It is sweet, in a way, that so many people don hats, red coats and false beards, dressing up as living embodiments of seasonal largesse. Isn’t this a celebration of our finest potential? You may need to make special allowances for particular people this season but your kindness will not go unnoticed, unappreciated or unrewarded. Merry Christmas? It should be! I have a short, inspiring message for you. Call 1900 959 005.

libra

Sep 23 - Oct 22

We cannot begin to imagine how stressful Santa’s annual journey must be. Oh, the responsibility of getting every present right. No wonder we never hear from him for the rest of the year. It must take him that long to recover! And what an example he sets! Millions, worldwide, then decide that if he can take the pressure, so can they. So they let themselves be burdened with more duties than they can cope with. You’ll do what you need to get done this Christmas but remember, what you really need to do… is relax. Merry Christmas! If it loses it sparkle give me a call. I have good news: 1900 959 005.

sagittarius

Nov 20 - Dec 20

You aren’t the only optimist in the world today. If such a statement is true at any time, it surely has particular resonance on a day like this when even millions of usually persistent pessimists are seemingly willing to put aside their doubts and embrace the idea of hope and peace for all. At some point this Christmas, you are likely to have a conversation with a fellow believer in the possibility of a better world. That process of dialogue may yet prove constructive in a permanent, life-changing fashion. Need some heart-warming news? Call your NEW Christmas forecast: 1900 959 005.

aquarius

Jan 20 - Feb 17

Uranus, ruler of your sign, is stationary. Not actually or physically - but an optical illusion causes us to perceive this planet as standing still against the backdrop of the ecliptic. Ah, but is not the whole of existence one continuous illusion? There is something happening in your life this Christmas that demands a double-take. You can look at it one way and see one thing. You can look again and see something else. Don’t be in too much of a rush to reach a definitive answer. Let mystery give rise to magic. Be ready for the gifts this Christmas can bring you. Give me a call on 1900 959 005.

taurus

Apr 20 – May 20

‘Santa baby, hurry down the chimney today.’ So goes the song originally sung by Eartha Kitt. It has stood the test of time, surviving even where chimneys are no longer functional. Many festive traditions have had to adapt to progress. Sleighs pulled by flying reindeer would never be granted flight paths by modern air traffic control. No wonder we aren’t so sure what or whom to believe in any more. But that doesn’t mean you can’t believe in your own ability to enjoy a happy holiday. You can. You will! Give me a call if you need cheering up over the festive season: 1900 959 005.

cancer

Jun 21 – Jul 21

It is 38 years since the world last saw a Full Moon on Christmas Day. Full Moons are, of course, important to Cancerians. You come, at times like this, into the peak of your power. This is when you grow strong, even if it is also when you tend to experience greatest vulnerability. Yet isn’t that what you are most respected for: the ability to be both deeply sensitive and profoundly wise at the same time? Let Santa give the material gifts tonight. You’ve got precious observations and valuable insights to share. Have a wonderful Christmas. If you need a broader perspective, call 1900 959 005.

virgo

Aug 23 - Sep 22

Is Christmas going to be easy? Of course not. When is it ever easy? Those who take the season seriously know it requires the investment of hard work and consistent effort. We get back what we put in. And for those for whom the festival has a less immediate meaning or simply triggers wistful thoughts about how things might have been - if only this or that had not occurred - it isn’t easy either. But that does not mean it is not beautiful, magical and healing. Be open to what the cosmos wants to show you now. Have a wonderful Christmas. Make it full of cheer! Give me a call! 1900 959 005.

scorpio

Oct 23 - Nov 21

A jolly elf on a reindeer-powered global delivery round raises interesting questions. What emotional dynamics are encountered during such a marathon? Everyone gets something given to them - or at least everyone whose cultural associations connect them to this belief. And for those to whom Christmas has no meaning? There need be no gift! Such heartless discrimination! Such prejudice! Wrongs are often hidden within apparent ‘rights’. Be delicate about what you dismiss (and accept) this Christmas. If the pressure is growing and you need some Christmas cheer, call me! 1900 959 005.

capricorn

Dec 2 1 - Jan 19

Christmas is a recently invented festival. A mere 2,000 years old. Less, indeed, because it was some centuries after the death of Jesus before anyone aligned his theoretical birthday with the ancient celebration of Saturnalia. That was always the season of your ruler: Father Time, who is usurped, each year end, by a new deity symbolising youth. Unless, perhaps, he is simply a single entity engaged in an eternal process of rebirth. Either way, this Christmas, you’ll rediscover energy, enthusiasm and love for life. I’ve got a festive message for you that will make Christmas sparkle. Call 1900 959 005.

pisces

Feb 18 - Mar 19

In the interest of efficiency, many traditional tasks are combined these days. Perhaps it is appropriate therefore, to suggest that Santa’s role as a parcel delivery specialist, could be constructively merged with that of a cosmic troubleshooter. Are there not many people in the world now, who face trouble with which they so sorely need some seasonal assistance? Whether or not an official redefinition of the great elf’s terms of engagement can be achieved, you can can perform a great act of kindness this Christmas. Give yourself a treat this Christmas! Call your inspiring new forecast: 1900 959 005.