Sleepwalking into a catastrophe
THERE was a time when I was an accomplished somnambulist, rising from my bed in the small hours to wander the house before waking up and not knowing, for one terrifying moment, where I was.
It’s a while since I’ve gone for a midnight stroll, but the sensation has returned over the past few weeks as I have joined the rest of the electorate in sleepwalking towards next Saturday’s election.
The bribes keep coming, a few hundred million here, another few hundred million there, but it’s doubtful by now if anyone is still listening. The voters by now are asleep, lulled into a trance by the endless chants of candidates for high office that tell us that beginning next week, things are going to get better.
Two million voters have already marched zombie-like to the early polling booths, not bothering to wait to hear the last week of promised handouts, just eager to get the whole dreadful business of voting over and done with.
Come next week ScoMo, a latecomer to the chameleon party, is going to change and become more inclusive. Albo has already changed and reversed his stance on pretty much everything he has stood for in the past 20 years. Yep, things are absolutely going to get better.
We’ll awake on Monday to greet the dawn of a new age, which somehow will be brighter.
If Albo wins gold, then there’ll be wage rises for everyone.
When someone promises to pay you more for doing the same amount of work, does it sound too good to be true? Probably.
The government has no power to set wages, but let’s not haggle over the details. It’s the thought, after all, that counts.
Anyone who has any spare cash lying about should head out on Monday and buy a childcare centre as both parties have attempted to outbid each other in their attempts to buy the family vote with subsidies.
The fact that childcare centres crank up their charges and increase their profits as the subsidies increase is not seen as an impediment to this madness. Our children have fled the nest, so we can’t be bought by the childcare sweeteners and I’ve no intention of buying an electric vehicle because they are boring to drive and I love the smell of petrol in the morning, so promising me an eco-friendly set of wheels isn’t going to do it.
Fifty per cent of Australians polled recently thought we contributed more than 10 per cent of global emissions, but I know it’s a fraction over 1 per cent and nothing we do will have the slightest effect on the global climate. Australia emits just over 400,000 tonnes and this is decreasing. China alone emits 11,500 million tonnes and this is increasing. Go figure.
By the time we reach ScoMo and Albo’s target of net zero in 2050, I will have achieved my own net zero target by being well and truly deceased. In the unlikely event that I am still here, I will be extremely old and very cranky, but hopefully still able to laugh at whoever is PM as they explain why we missed the targets, they were after all only an aspiration to be dragged out at election times.
If either party had shown they were serious about our defence capability and had some appreciation of the challenges ahead, they might have won me over, but successive governments have left the nation tragically unprepared for any future conflict.
Billions of dollars have been wasted on procurement programs,
THE GOVERNMENT HAS NO POWER TO SET WAGES, BUT LET’S NOT HAGGLE OVER THE DETAILS. IT’S THE THOUGHT, AFTER ALL, THAT COUNTS.
which run overtime and over budget and provide equipment which is ill-suited to our needs.
Housing affordability? Hands up all those who can remember when houses were cheap? No one? Exactly. They’ve never been cheap and never will be, so anyone who promises they can make them so does not speak the truth.
I’m less convinced of the likelihood of a resounding Labor victory than some, but the one thing of which I am certain is that regardless of the outcome, things will get a lot worse before they get better.