The Chronicle

Dinner dates show true colours

You can gain a lot of useful insights into a potential partner while seeing if they can use cutlery

- with Helen Hawkes

WHAT makes the ideal first date? The kind that may lead to a house, 2.4 children and a white picket fence or, at the very least, sex and romance. Mea culpa, mea culpa. Let us immediatel­y right that wrong.

If you are contemplat­ing a first date, that may lead to a relationsh­ip or to sex, I have two words for you: dinner date.

Yes, I know these days relationsh­ip gurus advise a coffee meeting to get to know someone you have met through letshookup.com

But what I am saying is that nowhere will you get better clues about a person you may wish to have some kind of relationsh­ip with than in an establishm­ent that serves food.

Obviously the very act of eating is connected with a biological need. Everyone has to eat, hence an invitation for this kind of date is more difficult to refuse.

Most people are interested in the idea of a free meal, especially at a desirable venue, if you’re offering.

That hurdle overcome, dress in your best, wear a little aftershave/perfume and come prepared to observe your date’s behaviour and garner vital clues.

Of course you may not wish to play detective and that’s fine too. A restaurant is also a great place simply to enjoy food, wine and a few laughs if you’re not auditionin­g your date for the role of significan­t other, or sexual partner. But then, can I ask, why are you going on this date exactly? Maybe think about that.

So ready? A person with good table manners is more likely to be a considerat­e partner and lover than someone who rests their elbows on their table, eats with their mouth open and doesn’t seem to know how to use cutlery.

Someone who is prepared to try something different on the menu can probably boast a more adventurou­s attitude to life and sex than someone who says "I always have the sweet and sour prawns". In fact, they might as well add, "I only like missionary".

A person who is tight about prices is equally likely to be tight about spending money on the house or the children, if you get that far. And be warned that someone who is rude to the waiter/ waitress will be talking to you like that in five years’ time.

The dream dinner date is the person who takes you to a restaurant where they know you will like the food, even if they don’t really like Mexican/Indian/Japanese themselves, who insists you have anything you desire no matter what the price, and who makes the serving staff feel appreciate­d but not leered at. If he takes you to the equivalent of hooters, it’s trouble. Ditto if she only seems to know restaurant­s where she’s slept with the maître d’/barman/waiter.

Someone who can choose a wine or, if they can’t, doesn’t pretend to be a buff; who keeps up an intelligen­t conversati­on and doesn’t instantly go eyes down and fork up when the food arrives; and who isn’t a glutton on the scale of Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life, also has relationsh­ip potential.

A willingnes­s to share food, if asked, also scores points, while someone whose fork veers towards your plate, unasked, to stab the last chip, will be the same person rifling through your wallet when they’re short at the end of the week.

So if you want to get to second base, remember, food and wine plus good company is the perfect recipe for the start of a relationsh­ip, if you cook it right.

 ?? PHOTO: THINKSTOCK ?? A restaurant is also a great place simply to enjoy food, wine and a few laughs ... or to check out a potential significan­t other.
PHOTO: THINKSTOCK A restaurant is also a great place simply to enjoy food, wine and a few laughs ... or to check out a potential significan­t other.
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